Vaughn’s lips roll in. “You’re right… North Rain Gray it is.”
“So accommodating,” I say, my tone frivolous.
I begin to walk past him, but he reaches out to touch my elbow and my feet become stuck to the ground, unwilling to leave, because he has me invested in what comes next.
“I’ll calm down eventually.” He means it, I can tell.
“Enough to stop by the baby shower?” Maybe I sound hopeful, and I'm not sure why, considering he wasn't even in the picture a few days ago.
Now a half-smile appears, lighting the air between us. “Guys go to those?”
My shoulder rolls back. “Not particularly. I mean, some baby showers have the guys there, and they do ridiculous little games. Not this one, it’s more a ladies’ high tea. But the dad… normally stops by.”
“I, uh, I’ll see.”
“Right, of course.” I swallow my disappointment. Suddenly, it feels like we’re not taking any steps. Besides, I was going to go to this party before he ever found out anyhow.
I begin to move again, but his hand is glued to me. “Isla…” It seems he has something profound to say. “Do you have any names in mind?” It feels like a cop out, but fine, I’ll run with it.
“No, I’m struggling with that part,” I admit.
“I can imagine. She’ll take my last name?” His voice sounds elusive.
“Oh, I didn’t really think about that yet.” I’m truthful, as I just assumed she would have mine, but now that he’s in the picture, I’m not sure.
"She should have it." He nods once then lets my arm go.
Feeling as though this is my opportunity for an exit, I walk away until I stop and spin on my heel. I notice that his eyes are still on me, filled with a blaze that isn’t anger as his finger traces his jawline.
“Vaughn, I really am sorry,” I repeat for what feels like the hundredth time.
His head tips lower before striking back up. “I think if we have any chance to make it the next few months and to raise this baby together, then you need to stop saying sorry. Eventually, I’ll understand.”
I appreciate that so much that a wry smile creates a line on my mouth.
“I’ll send you the baby shower details.”
“I’m not sure if I’ll come, but maybe.”
Inside something hurts a little. I recognize that it’s that fear again, that he won’t be fully invested in our daughter’s life.
“Fine.” I charge off, needing to go lock myself in my bedroom, wishing that it was his, because all is well, not only for our baby… but us.
15
VAUGHN
Staring down at the tablet in the training arena’s boardroom, I’m looking over stats for the list of players that we’ll hopefully manage to get in the upcoming draft next week. I’m changing windows on the screen as I compare one sheet to the other, which are contract negotiations. As much as I enjoy seeing Briggs with the other names that will probably leave, I also feel slight remorse for having that feeling. He is a great player and Isla’s brother, so I better get on that bandwagon. However, I know if he goes to another team that Isla will probably be devastated.
I don’t particularly want her upset, which is why I feel like a bit of a jerk lately that I’ve been distant and sometimes cold then warm. As much as the secret she kept is a hole somewhere within, I was right when I told her that she needs to stop apologizing if we have any hope of focusing on the future.
The future.
The one I have no clue what it will hold for us.
I’ve ignored every time it flashes in my mind that eventually we will need to confront the issue of us, but then it blows out of mind just as fast.
I glance to one of the guys from the management team to see that everyone is busy at work with various tasks. At least one thing is clear and it’s that this career move was right, near exhilarating.
