“You don’t need to be waiting on me or watching my every move,” I comment.
The corner of his mouth tilts up. “Since when do I listen to you?”
A slither of amusement attempts to break through my darkness inside. “I thought you had a meeting for the summer camp for kids that you’re volunteering at?”
Connor leans back on his arms, his body now half splayed on the bed. “You’re trying to get rid of me, but that ain’t happening. I told them that I wouldn’t be in today, that something came up.”
“Oh.” I stand on my spot, now studying him.
This will be my life until I find some form of closure surrounding the men in my life. Connor won’t relent until I’m at peace, even if he’s part of the reason that I’m in this state.
But in my shower, it kept circling in my head what he has repeated several times. The truth wasn’t his secret to tell. I’ve attempted to imagine myself in his shoes, and to be honest, I’m not sure what I would’ve done.
So, I’ve decided for now that I’ll have a temporary truce in my head when it comes to Connor and focus on my dad. Doesn’t mean it’s back to roses and sunshine with Connor, but I’m not going to run away.
And right now, Connor is before me trying to help.
I need him too.
To hollow the numbness.
I take a few confident strides to him, stopping short of his knees. He brings his body up, as I have his full attention.
Dropping onto his lap, I swing my leg over to staddle him. I settle in his lap and feel his length twitch and grow hard against the apex of my thighs. Connor doesn’t move, including his eyes that are pinned to mine. He’s going to let me lead because he knows this is what I want.
Bringing my hands to cradle his face, I splay my fingers along his jaw and cheek while I press my body to his and take command. “I don’t want to think right now, just… feel alive,” I rasp in desperation.
“Then use me,” he whispers adamantly.
I bring my lips to his and kiss him with intention. It’s warm and sensual, grounding me, and it stops the spinning in my world right now. I press harder against his lips with a force that causes the towel around me to loosen and fall gently. Ignoring it, I begin to ride on top of Connor, my hips moving in waves to feel friction against my pussy.
Connor gets his shirt off before our lips are glued to one another again, and his hands run down the sides of my body to find a home on my hips.
My arms rest on his strong shoulders, and our position only encourages him to lower his mouth to my breast. With the towel now fallen to my waist, he has prime access to my breasts, which is why he is eager to swirl his tongue around one nipple. I moan, with my entire body feeling extra sensitive, except for the pounding ache of my clit and the dampness between my thighs.
I’m turning greedy too, and I guide his mouth to my other breast. I want his mouth and fingers everywhere; it won’t be enough.
When he’s done teasing my hard nipple that only intensifies my senses, he leaves a trail of hurried kisses up my neck to find my mouth again. I close my eyes and let myself get lost in this momentary ecstasy.
Keeping my legs wrapped around him, he rolls us until I’m underneath him, and the towel gets lost in the process, leaving me naked. He drags my arms over my head, pressed against the mattress as our lips skim one another and stay in a dance.
“I’ll do anything you want.” His voice is full of lust as he traps my bottom lip with a featherlike brush of his lips.
My hips tilt up to feel his hard shaft, and I can’t get a release fast enough.
“I just need you inside of me,” I whisper as we thrust our bodies together.
“Then I’ll take you.”
I break my wrists away from his hand that had them pinned and find the zipper of his jeans, urging him to undo them, and the desperation inside of me to touch his bare cock is overwhelming. He slides them off in record time and then I receive my wish, with my hand wrapping around his long length, enjoying his gasp that vibrates against our open mouths that touch.
Taking charge, I urge him to his back and crawl on top of him.
I plunge down onto his cock with pure abandon, closing my eyes and focusing only on the feeling of being full. I move up and down, finding the right angle that hits the spot I like.
My hair falls over my shoulders as I tip my head back and close my eyes. I don’t dare dip my gaze down to see Connor. It would make it far too intense.
Too real.
