“You’ll keep an eye on her?” Spencer requests faintly with his voice unsteady.
I only half glance over my shoulder. “Of course.” He doesn’t even need to ask.
“Take care of her. I’ll be back,” he promises.
I do my best to give him a comforting look. “I know, Spencer. I think right now she needs space to take it all in.”
He sniffles and stands there for a long heavy minute before leaving me to ponder how I’m going to support Hadley in this very moment. I’m not exactly in her good graces, but she deserves to know the entire truth.
I reach for the liquor cabinet and pour myself a shot of bourbon, down it, then pour another, but this one is for Hadley, to help calm her nerves.
I head straight to our room to find the door closed and locked. I knock gently with hope she’ll let me in. “Hadley, your dad is gone. It’s just you and me. Let me in.”
She doesn’t answer, but I hear her crying into a pillow, the sound muffled.
I take a deep breath, step back, then use my weight to press against the door to break it open. It’s actually easier than I anticipated. Only a little of the alcohol spills over onto my hand in the process.
My move takes her by surprise, and she sits up in the bed, her face red and puffy. She may be a mess, but she is still a beautiful disaster.
“Get out,” she demands.
I hold up the glass of alcohol. “No.” I walk to the bed and set it on the bedside table. “Here. This will help you calm down.”
She goes quiet again, and I make no effort to sit on the bed with her, as I’m waiting for her clues for how to approach her.
Her eyes are sunken with pure sadness. “You knew,” she states, still in disbelief.
“Yeah.”
“Is that why you came to my room and said I was a mistake?”
I lick my lips, because the truth fucking hurts, and I hate saying it all out loud. It’s like a knife wound when you hear the words. “Yes.”
“You’re an asshole.”
I agree, but I felt my arms were always twisted. “Hadley, it wasn’t my truth to tell. You know that too.”
“So you just pushed me away?”
I laugh bitterly to myself. “Don’t you see?” I sit on the bed and take hold of her face between my hands because she has to understand my reasoning, I won’t have it any other way. “I’ve been trying my damnedest to break your heart all these years to actually ensure it stays mended.” My voice breaks because I’m aching too.
“That’s why you hated me?”
“I never fucking hated you. The opposite. But I couldn’t have you close because I didn’t know if I could keep the secret. It’s not my place to tell you, and your relationship with your dad is everything to you.”
She laughs then takes hold of my hands to remove them from her cheeks. “What was your big plan, Connor? Never tell me, even though I’m your wife?” she snarls.
I stand up again and pinch the bridge of my nose. “Truthfully? You want the honest truth?”
“Yes,” she bites out.
“I wasn’t going to tell you. I just knew that if you ever found out that it would be harder for you to leave me if we are married.” I raise my voice because the truth is confronting.
Her jaw goes slack from my admission, and it feels like the air in the room evaporated.
“Wow.” She huffs a breath before she looks to the side then brings her sight back to me. “Get out.”
“No.” I stand there, defiant.
