I shudder from the thought while April chortles a laugh and returns to her oven pan.
“I forgot I had all this laundry for Hadley. I was going to just leave it here and hoped to check if you lined up a babysitter for the coming period?”
My head drops slightly, and I rub my cheek while I groan. “The babysitter we had lined up dropped out due to a sick relative. I have my team reaching out to another agency to find someone.”
My mom begins to look in her purse, probably for a Tic Tac if I know her well enough. “Spencer, it needs to get sorted out. Your father and I can’t watch her forever. I love my grandbaby, and we will help when we can, but you know that it isn’t what...” She pauses when she realizes she's struggling to finish the sentence.
I save her and jump in. “It’s fine. I mean, I really just need someone to cook and clean, and I can take care of Hadley.”
April offers me a soft reassuring smile before she turns to put her food in the oven.
“I’m happy to hear it, but you still need someone as a backup. Even in the off-season, you have all those fancy meetings, and you train a lot,” my mother explains.
I sigh, as she makes valid points. “I’ll find a way, okay.” I’m getting slightly frustrated with this conversation; I don’t enjoy being reminded of what I can improve on.
My mother turns her attention to April who doesn’t notice, then returns her gaze to me. My mom’s eyes grow big, as it is her way of asking for an explanation. I mouth back,"Friend." She subtly shakes her head that she doesn’t believe me.
“I hope my son and his daughter aren't wearing you out,” my mother says, attempting conversation.
“Not at all. Hadley is adorable,” April comments.
“April has gotten Hadley to experiment with food,” I add.
“Maybe you should be her next nanny then,” my mother jokes.
April smiles. “I think you need a professional for that role, and I’m heading back to the city soon anyway.”
Right, because April doesn’t live here in Lake Spark unless I have a sex tape about to be leaked.
“Well, I’m going to leave you two alone. I have errands to run. By the way, you remember Hadley has her check-up with the pediatrician next week, right?”
I salute my mother. “Yeah, it’s in the shared calendar.”
My mom waves to April and she says goodbye. A minute later, we are free from my mother’s watch.
But still, I heave a sigh at the reminder of my responsibility. It makes me feel like everyone is waiting for me to fail when all I want to do is prove them wrong.
Leaning against the fridge, I wonder if this feeling of missing a piece will ever go away.
April nudges my arm with her own and comes to my side, and we both look forward at the ground. “She seems nice.”
“Can’t complain.”
“Hadley will love having more time with you and less with a babysitter,” she points out.
I’m not entirely convinced, and my face stiffens as I feel my lack of assurance set in.
April gives me a soft look, almost empathetic, as if she wants to say something more, but instead she smiles shyly and looks away before walking to the other side of the kitchen to grab Pickles’ leash.
“Don’t be in a grumpy mood today,” she calls out. I’m bewildered as to how she understands my brain because I’m not exactly on the express train to happy right now. The last few minutes put a damper on my day.
Before I can argue, she is out of sight but not out of my mind.
* * *
Tiptoeing to Hadley’s bed,I’m careful to lift the pillow under her head while she sleeps. Thankfully her night light is on, which gives me enough coverage to ensure my task is successful. Pickles perks his head up from where he is lying at the end of her bed.
Slipping the hundred-dollar bill under Hadley’s pillow, I grab her little plastic treasure chest that holds a tooth.
