“I’m so sorry, Kaia. I didn’t… I wasn’t trying to shut you out. I just got so caught up in the secrecy of it all, in protecting Owenand Jax’s friendship, that I didn’t stop to think about what I was doing to us.”
Silence stretched across the line.
“I would have kept your secret,” she finally said, quieter now. “You know I would have. I wouldn’t have told Jax. I wouldn’t have told anyone. I just... I would have beenthere. For the good parts, the scary parts, and all of it.”
“I know. I know you would have.”
“Just... don’t do that again, okay? Don’t shut me out. I’m always on your side first. Always.”
I nodded, even though she couldn’t see me. “I won’t. I promise.”
“Good.”
“How’s Jax?” I asked after a moment, dreading the answer but needing to know. “Is he still...”
“Furious?” Kaia let out a long breath. “Yeah. He’s been pacing around the house since that phone call. Kailyn’s the only thing that calms him down, and even then, he keeps muttering under his breath about loyalty and betrayal and twenty years of friendship.”
My stomach twisted. “That bad?”
“You know how Jax is. He’s always been overprotective of you and Syn. It’s not just about Owen breaking some unspoken rule, it’s that Jax genuinely believes he’s supposed to shield you from getting hurt and Owen’s track record...” She trailed off.
“Isn’t exactly reassuring,” I finished.
“Right. But Harlow, he’ll come around. He always does. Remember when Syn got her first tattoo without telling him? He didn’t speak to her for three days, and then he was buying her lunch like nothing happened.”
“This feels bigger than a tattoo.”
“It is bigger. But Jax loves you, and he loves Owen. Even if he’s too angry to admit it right now.” She paused. “He’s justscared. He knows that if Owen hurts you, it won’t just break your heart. It’ll be the end of their friendship. There will be no coming back from it.”
The weight of those words settled over me, heavier than the one already wrapped around my shoulders.
And what happens when he finds out we flew to Vegas and got married behind everyone’s back?
The thought hit me like ice water. Tomorrow morning, Owen and I would be on a plane to Vegas. By the time we made it to visit Jax and Kaia, I’d be Owen’s wife, and Jax, who was already furious about us dating, had no idea.
How much worse would it be when he found out we eloped without telling anyone?
Would he ever forgive us then?
I pushed the thought down, burying it beneath layers of justification. We were doing this for us. We were doing this because we loved each other and didn’t need or want anyone’s permission.
But the guilt lingered, settling into the spaces between my ribs.
“Can I tell you something?” I asked, desperate to anchor myself to something other than the spiral of what-ifs.
“Of course.”
I took a deep breath, letting the cold air fill my lungs.
“Owen makes me feel seen,” I said slowly, searching for the right words. “Like he notices things about me that I didn’t even know were there. He remembers the stupid stuff I say in passing and brings it up weeks later. He knows when I’m stressed before I do, and he doesn’t try to fix it or tell me to calm down. He just... sits with me. In it.”
Kaia was quiet on the other end.
“He makes me laugh,” I continued. “The kind that hurts your stomach. He argues with me about rom-com logic and lets mesteal his hoodies and never once has he made me feel like I’m too much or not enough.”
“He’s sweet and thoughtful.” My throat tightened. “I know you all see the guy who messed things up with Cam. The guy who makes impulsive decisions and doesn’t always think things through. But that’s not all he is. That’s not even most of what he is. Not with me.”
I pulled the blanket higher, tucking it under my chin.
