“Love what?”
“Riding? There were two bikes out there, and since one is purple with red roses on it, and smaller than the other, I knew it was yours. Did you love riding?”
My emotions got caught in my throat, but I pushed them down. “Yes. I didn’t think I would love it as much as I did, but Chase would take me out on rides through the countryside, and I loved how freeing it felt. So, for my last birthday, he signed me up for classes and surprised me with my bike. We planned to take a road trip to California and ride the Pacific Coast Highway on our bikes. Guess fate had other plans.”
“If you loved it before, you could learn to love it again.”
I closed my eyes. “Maybe,” I agreed, even though I felt like my heart was breaking.
Cap pulled into the local grocery store and parked the car. “We need to get some food. Your cabinets and fridge are empty.”
“I haven’t been eating much.”
“I gathered that. It’s one thing we are going to work on.”
I sighed audibly. “You know you can’t fix people, right? There’s nothing you could do to fix me short of bringing my husband back from the dead.”
“He’s a bit out of my reach, Ruby, and you don’t need fixing. You need to grieve and accept his loss so you can live a full life. You’re not broken–just bruised. You’re holding onto your grief and your anger because you don’t feel like life is worth living without him, but it is. You can find happiness and fulfillment again, Ruby. It will take time and work. It won’t be easy, and it won’t be quick, but it is possible to have a life after losing someone you love.”
Living a life without the man I loved wasn’t what I wanted. We made promises to each other. We had plans for our future. Nothing that I was counting on was even possible anymore, and I didn’t know how to cope or change the path my life had been on. I didn’t want to change it, but life changed it for me. And here I am, grocery shopping with a man that wasn’t my husband, released into his temporary custody until he and the doctor deem me ready to be on my own.
My life was no longer my own, and to tell the truth, it hadn’t been since the moment my husband died in that wreck.
Chapter Nine
Ruby fell into step behind me as we meandered through the grocery store aisles. She fingered products here and there, picking them up to read the labels, then scrunching her face in the cutest way as she put it back. At least she was emoting something other than depression and loss.
“Do you like spaghetti?”
She lifted her head, those blue eyes catching the light overhead just right. Her shoulders slightly shrugged. “Sure. Doesn’t everybody?”
I laughed. “Actually, I know of two people that despise spaghetti.”
“Really?”
I thought back to the last club dinner we had, where we fed Pincher spaghetti. Most of the club was too focused on finding him sleeping on our back doorstep, so nobody was paying attention to the revulsion the twins were having to the big bowl of noodles in the center of the table. But not me, I was side-tracked by their obvious disgust of pasta perfection, and can’t get their conversation out of my head:
“I can’t–” Castor whispered, covering his mouth. “I’ll figure out something else to eat.”
“Oh god, it’s the kind that looks like worms,” Pollux added, turning a tiny shade of green.
“What if they start moving?” Castor dropped his voice even lower.
“Like the Chinese takeout box in that Vampire movie mom forced us to watch?”
Castor nodded.
“I’m out.”
“Me too,” Castor agreed. Both of them shuddered, turning away from the bowl of noodles to focus on Pincher. But I did catch them casting wary side glances at the noodles every time someone shoved some in their face. I found their reactions quite amusing.
Something about spaghetti noodles really repulsed them, and I figured there was some sort of backstory to it, but never really asked them about it.
“Yeah, we have twins in our club named Castor and Pollux. For some reason, the sight of spaghetti noodles turns them all queasy. It’s actually quite hilarious. They’ll eat any other kind of pasta as long as it’s not long and looks like worms.”
“Why?”
“No idea. But one day I’m going to have to ask them.”
