As he moved to the sofa, her eyes lowered to long legs and thick, muscular thighs. She rolled her eyes at her salacious thoughts and moved to join him.
“There’s news on Boogie?” she asked as she sat.
His brow rose with amusement. “Now, Rebecca, you know damn well that’s not why I’m here,” he said through a chuckle.
Soft laughter escaped. “I tried it, didn’t I?”
“Yeah, you tried.”
When the laughter ceased, Nick pulled her hand from her lap and held it in his. “You left me.” His solemn tone made her feel even guiltier than she did when she’d left.
Rebecca dropped her head. “I’m sorry.” She sighed. “I felt guilty.”
He squeezed her hand. “I feel guilty too,” he admitted.
She understood. Of course, he felt guilty.
“While my wife lay lifeless, I succumbed to a temptation that I’ve had since the moment I laid eyes on you. I feel guilty that it’s not me in that hospital bed. I feel guilty that she isn’t resting in peace. Instead, she’s being kept alive to give birth to my child. I feel guilty about wanting you so bad. Yeah, I feel very guilty. But I don’t feel bad. I don’t feel bad at all about the way it felt when you were in my arms. I don’t feel bad about how amazing it was to be inside you.”
He put an arm around her shoulders, pulled her to him, and kissed her forehead. “I don’t feel bad about falling asleep with your head on my chest. However, what Idofeel bad about is waking up alone. Maybe the way I feel for you is wrong, but I’m not perfect. I am just a man. Rebecca, Ilovemy wife, and my wife loves me. I have to believe that she wants me to be happy.”
She rested her head against his chest and sighed. After all he’d been through, she loved the possibility of being the one to make him happy. Unfortunately, it would be a task she could not complete.
She inhaled a deep breath and sat straight. “Nick, I’m dying,” she confessed in a whisper.
His face twisted into a frown. “What?”
“I should’ve told you before we... I’m so sorry.”
He turned her to look her in the eye. “Rebecca, what are you talking about?”
“I have a bad heart.”
“And it can’t be fixed?”
“No.”
She’d come to terms with her fate, but sharing it with him was taking her back to the dark place she was in when she first found out.
“What do you mean? Surgery? Medication? Nothing can fix it?”
Rebecca shook her head. “I need a new heart, Nick.”
He threw his hands up as if he’d come up with the obvious solution. “Okay then. You’ll get a heart. Aren’t you on a donor list or something?”
She was saddened by the desperation in his voice. “Yes, I’m at the top of the list, but I have a rare blood type. Actually, it’s the rarest. The chance of me being matched with a donor is unlikely.”
He clutched her upper arms and studied her through wrinkled brows. “Have you given up?”
“No,” she lied through a whisper because she had to. His sorrowful demeanor was just too hard, too much to bear.
“That’s why you’re seeing Dr. Thantos.”
Rebecca confirmed with a smile. “He’s helping to enhance my quality of life.”
“Yeah, how so?”
“Just in case I don’t—”
