“What you have here, with your friends and family, I see the value in the connections and the feelings between you—like how you love and care for Antimony. I have never had… I was not allowed to have that kind of life. I am friends with Kell and Rei, but that is different. I didn’t see the value in connecting with others until you released me. Until…”
More tingles of power crawled through my fingers, like his skin was humming with it, and he was sending it to me. I sucked in a breath and held it as his hands laced through my hair. “I shouldn’t. It’s not fair.” He licked his lips, heating my belly downward.
“Then don’t think,” I said, sliding my hands around to his neck and tugging his head down. His lips crashed against mine, hungry and wanting. Wet and hot. Creating an ache that there was only one solution for. His hands seared over my belly andchest. I pulled his shirt up, kissing down his chest. I wanted every inch of him exposed. It was so right, here under the stars.
“Sorrel? Are you out here?” Ori’s voice called from the front door. A wire pulled taut inside me, and I dropped my hands and stepped away, suddenly freezing cold.
Ranth and I exchanged glances.
“Not done with you,” I mouthed, tugging my shirt down. I smoothed my hair and walked around the corner. “Hey, Ori,” I said as Ranth came up behind me. His presence now felt like it was actually tethered to me. “We went for a walk. What’s up?”
“The police called and want to talk to you.”
“Right. Okay.” The fire already seemed days ago, but it was only hours. The loss of my life’s work and all the memories of Mom sent shivers through me. “It’s freezing out here,” I said, starting back to the house, not daring to look back because Ori would read any look I gave Ranth. My heart raced at the scent of amber and sandalwood that clung to me. I wasn’t sure how we were going to steal another moment, but I was so not done with him.
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
The police call was short, as Bud wasn’t letting me say much without a lawyer, but since I was absent at the time of the loss, they wanted to know basic stuff. The insurance company was sending an adjustor and an inspector to appraise the damage. Smoke and water apparently did almost as much damage as fire. Bud had called a security company to police the site until it cooled off and we decided how to salvage whatever was left. The grimoire in the oven might have survived, and I was holding out hope for some things from the basement, but Bud said the firemen thought the water heater had exploded. That was in the basement. If that was true, the herbarium would probably be toast. The room turned glassy.What was lost, was gone. What could be rebuilt, I would rebuild.I had to keep going.
Talking about the fire had temporarily eclipsed what had happened outside with Ranth, but every time I looked at him, it was like stuffing kindling in embers. Right now, his back was to me as he looked out the window at the distant lights of Guerneville. His arms were crossed. I wanted to know what he was thinking, but I’d have to have skin contact… Bubbles of nerves bounced like fresh kombucha. Icouldask him. What I really wanted was to have more time alone with him. If we sent him back to the Garden, tonight might be my only chance to make memories.
I handed Bud his phone. “Thanks for all this,” I said and nodded at the pile of dishes on the counter. “Like always, you are there for me.”
“Cookie, I’m always here. I promised Lili, and I won’t ever let her, or you, down.”
“Speaking of Mom, you said you had her book, I mean, my book?”
“Oh yeah, that. I shouldn’t have said anything yet. I goofed.”
“Can I at least see it?”
“Nope. No can do. Lili was super specific. Twenty-five or nothing. She’d be furious if I even mentioned it.”
“Why twenty-five?”
“No idea, but I promised her.” His eyes went glassy, and my own burned with tears. I knew I wasn’t getting it out of him. Knowing him, he’d probably had it triple alarmed in some underground cache. I hid my disappointment in a hug. His arms enfolded me, and the CBD oil-infused essence of Bud clouded around me, strangely like home.
Ori, Freddie, and Rose were hanging out. Rose looked as wilted as I felt. We all needed showers and beds. Bud had threeextra bedrooms. One was mine, and Rose could share with Ori, which left Freddie and Ranth. I grinned at the thought.
“Who wants to go to bed?” I asked. Everyone looked at me like I was holding candy, or completely nuts, or a combination of both. Bud looked at me, confused. He chuckled. “Beds, sure, whatever you need. Use all the towels, there are extra blankets and pillows in the hall. It’s not every night I get my girl up here with friends. Go, tear it up.”
I walked into the living room. “Showers first. There are two bathrooms. I call dibs on one. Follow me to tonight’s luxury lodgings.” Water dripping down Ranth’s satiny skin, like when I’d seen him for the first time, flashed through my mind. Stuffing the sexy images in a mental lockbox, I led the way down the hall and up the stairs. Bud’s room was on the first floor, and the guest rooms plus his roof office were on the second. The second floor was undisturbed except for that room. My room was like I’d left it but dust free. Ranth came up behind me as I directed Ori and Rose and then Freddie. His hand traveled down from my shoulders to the small of my back. Ori and Rose exchanged knowing glances that confirmed there was no way I would be able to keep secrets from my friends in these close quarters. But did I want to start something that had no possible resolution? Well,helleboreyeah, I so did.
CHAPTER FORTY
Iclosed my bedroom door softly, almost not wanting to turn around because I’d have to face exactly what I intended to do. Ranth and I would have this night if he agreed. One night that would live forever.
I turned with the thought: Is one night of knowing someone from the inside out better than not knowing them at all?
I knew the answer.
Moonlight from the window sculpted Ranth’s face into shadowed planes. He stilled as I came close, the air alive with my breath and his presence. Hunger that had nothing to do with food burned in my stomach. I reached out, my fingers hovering over the silver scar which trailed down his neck like liquid silver over satin.
“How did you get this?” I asked, tracing the puckered flesh.
He inhaled under my caress, then covered my hand with his. My heart raced as his fingers tucked under my palm.
“It was long ago. A child’s foolishness. Now it feels like a story in my head, except for this proof.” His fingers slid down, capturing my wrist and lifting it. The contact sizzled over my skin, my pulse ramping. “I was playing with my brother in the flax fields. We were too young to be smart and too young to know the difference between anger and play. He lashed out with a sickle, and it tore my skin. I don’t remember the pain, but I remember my mother’s wail as she hovered over me. How desperate she sounded, as if I was on fire and she couldn’t put it out. My father gathered me into his arms. He carried me to an Ahknim healer. The healer saved me—and claimed my fate.”
