“Somewhere, along the way, someone showed you that their love was conditional. And that’s not really love, sweetheart. Because I know we’re a team. You need a little help right now becauseyou are pregnant. You’re literally growing little eyes, and chunky cheeks, and strong bones while I chop some vegetables for soup. If you’re worried about things being fair, or that you’re not doing enough for me, just know, the scales are tipped forever in your favor.”
“It’s not the same.” Her fingers twisted in her lap.
“How is it different? Why would you never put that on our daughter, but you’re okay with it being put on you? I need you to hear me when I say this next part. Okay?”
“Okay,” she replied.
“I love you. I am in love with you.You. Not because I know saying that will get me baked goodies, or my laundry taken care of. Or because you are giving me the gift of fatherhood.I love you. Happy you. Sassy you. Sad you. Sexy you. Anxious you. Fierce you. Each and every facet of Jessie Ford, I fucking love. And there is not one thing you ever have to do for me, or give to me, or take care of for me, to have that love. Am I making myself clear?”
She nodded, her heart skipping wild in her chest. Tears burned in the back of her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. “You love me?”
He chuckled. “Yeah, sweetheart. I do. And it’s okay if that’s overwhelming and you can’t say it back right now. It won’t change how I feel. How I’m pretty sure I’ve always felt about you.”
Jessie’s stomach swooped, Bee taking the opportunity to do a little roll as she gathered the courage to tell Hawk everything he meant to her. But the words wouldn’t form. So, she did the only thing she could think of at that moment. Herhands unclasped, reaching up to slide through Hawk’s hair. And when they reached the back of his head, she pressed a kiss to his lips.
When the kiss ended—after she’d poured her heart and soul and all the words she couldn’t say into it—he moved back, hair tousled and pupils blown wide, and he just smiled at her.
“I love you too,” she whispered.
His hand moved from her thigh up to her belly. “We’ll both show Bee that our love for her will always be there. Constant. Strong. Unwavering.”
“I’m scared I’m not going to be able to juggle it all. My mom knows that I don’t want to take over the diner. But what if my family won’t ever forgive me for choosing this… for choosing us and our little family? I have no idea what I want the future to look like, but I don’t want to ever have to put a business over my daughter. Over our family.”
“You need to stop putting so much pressure on yourself. Thinking about everyone’s needs over your own. Your mom and dad have people in this community who love them and will also support them. Dolly would have no problem finding someone to take over for her. Maybe I could talk to Sebastian and see if he was interested in rolling it into a community revival project fund like he did for Lacy when she started Petals, or your brother with his shop.”
She shook her head. “Maybe. I just can’t… I want to be everything for everyone. It’s what I’m good at. I want people to know they can count on me.”
“They do, sweetheart. But it’s not your job to make their dreams come true. It’s your job to make sure that your dreams do.” He pressed a kiss into the palm of her hand. “And that’s my job too. Even if I only ever remind you of that from time to time.”
“I’m scared,” she whispered. “I’m so scared I’m going towake up and this is all going to be a dream. That I’m going to be back to the day I found out about the baby, standing in the diner that night, except you don’t walk in. It’s so much easier when I just take care of everything for everyone.”
Hawk sat back and watched her for a minute before nodding. Without saying a word, he stood, scooping Jessie out of the chair and lifting her to rest against his chest.
“Hawk!”
“Shh. I have a response to what you just said… I just think it’ll be easier to deliver when we’re in the tub and I’ve got you cuddled against me.”
Twenty-Four
“How’s the temperature?” Hawk asked as Jessie rested against him.
“It’s perfect. Just know when the baby’s born, I’m going back to near-boiling bath temps.”
Hawk chuckled. “Noted.”
“I have to tell you something.”
“That sounds ominous. Do you want me to take down your hair and wash it? Or we can wait and I can shower with you tomorrow if you feel up to it?”
“You don’t have to wash my hair.”
His hands lifted out of the water and began to untangle her hair from the holder she’d tossed it all up into at the hospital.
“I know I don’t have to. But I’m happy to. I enjoy taking care of you, and it’s good practice for me. I’ll need to know how to do all this hair care stuff for our daughter. So stop fussing and let me learn. And tell me that ominous thing you’re thinking about.”
“It’s probably nothing.” Her lip was back between her teeth.
“That usually means it’s something…”
