“Are you mad at me?” he asked, eyes wide as he ran his hand through his hair.
“Yes! Why the hell wouldn’t I be? You don’t just give up everything for me. You’re allowed to be your own person, with your own goals and dreams. I should get the chance to support you for once! You’re so focused on me, I think you’ve completely lost the plot on everything else. I think… I think I need to go home.”
“This is your home, Jess. You’re not going anywhere. Talk to me.”
She reached up and rubbed at her temple. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to give up everything, all the things that make you who you are, to take care of me.”
“I know it’s hard for you to accept help, but I want to be doing these things. I want to share my home with you. I want to know that you and Bee are safe. I want to know that I’m providing for my family.”
“But I want that too, Hawk. I want to know that I’m contributing. I want to support you in your dreams outside of our family. It’s not fair that you should give up everything for me. You’re going to end up resenting me.”
“The only thing I’m resenting is this conversation,” he grumbled.
The telltale pressure of oncoming tears built at the back of her eyes. “Don’t you want us to have open communication?”
“Of course I do. But I just hate that I wasn’t the one to tell you. That it’s making you stressed out. It’s not good for you or the baby.”
“Stop worrying about what’s good for me and the baby for one second! What is good foryou?You’re throwing away your career!” Shit. A tear slipped down her cheek. “I would have gone with you. But you didn’t even talk to me about it. You just made a sweeping decision for our family and you’re not treating me like a capable partner!”
“Because that’s my job, Jessie! It’s to make sure the right decisions are made that keep you and Bee safe and happy.”
She was about to lose her cool. Instead of screaming, Jessie’s jaw tightened. She could feel her cheeks heating as her heartbeat pounded in her temples. “It’s not all on you. I wish you would have talked with me about this.”
“You shouldn’t be upset with me for doing what I thought was right for you and the baby.”
“I didn’t mean what I said before. I’m not mad at you.” Her voice trembled and the stupid tears she’d been fighting back unleashed. “I’m madforyou. That opportunity wasyours. All along. You’ve done everything right. And I’m mad that you felt you had to give that up for us. If you’re fine with it, then… fine! I’ll get over it.”
“Sweetheart—”
He was walking towards her in an instant, but she pressed her hand out, stopping him from getting closer.
“No. Don’t ‘sweetheart’ me right now. I need to cool off.” Jessie got up from the table, wincing as something near her hip pulled. “I hope you have a good day at work. The girls will all be there for breakfast, can you tell them I wasn’t feeling well and needed to stay home?”
His eyes went wide, dropping to the spot where she was rubbing her side. “Are you not feeling well?”
“I’m fine. I just don’t have the energy to go downstairs and fake being happy about how this whole situation was handled. Please just go to work, and I’ll try to get over it before you come home.”
Hawk nodded, still closing the distance between them and placing a kiss on her head.
“I hope you have a good day. Bye, Bee. Take care of your mommy for me today, okay?” His hand slid over her belly for just a second before he was out the door and the silence of the apartment was filled with crying.
Jessie heard her phone chime as she walked down the hallway towards their bedroom. Maybe she should call her mom and ask about staying at the ranch for a few nights? Or just one night?
No, she didn’t want to run. That would only hurt Hawk more. She was letting her emotions get the best of her.
Flipping the phone over, she saw more messages from the girls, but also a new thread from her group chat with Adrienne and Dawn. It was easy enough to read through their messages, but right as she was about to respond, a single message came through from Adrienne.
Hey! I hope everything’s okay! You’re usually so fast to respond in the chat, I just got a weird feeling something might be wrong.
God, she’d been such a bad friend lately. To everyone. But especially Adrienne, who had been so sweet and supportive since she had to leave the diner.
I’m okay. Just a bit of a morning around here. You know how that is.
Yeah, I get it. Want to talk about it?
Actually, yeah, I’d love to. What’s your work schedule look like?
Hawk’s leg bounced up and down under his desk. He knew he’d made a mistake not talking to Jessie when he decided to turn down the job, but he’d honestly expected her to feel happy about not having to uproot her life. It was full of friends who loved her, and with a new baby in a new place, it would have been so hard to foster new friendships as well. Here, they had a built-in support system. There… they would have just been all on their own.
