“Geez, Mom, slow down,” I suggested. “I’ll tell youalmosteverything.”
She looked like she was going to come across the table and shake the words out of me if I didn’t hurry up. I took a deep breath.
“No, he doesn’t own his own company. He’s a voice actor.”
Mom’sgasp rang out across the patio. “A voice actor? Please tell me you don’t mean commercials.”
Puzzled, I thought back over the conversations I had with Ryan. “I’m not sure if he’s done commercials before, but that’s not what he does for the most part.”
A clap came next as Mom clasped her hands to her chest.
“What’s gotten into you?” I asked.
She dropped her voice to a whisper. “Does he do those naughty books?”
“Mom!” I yelped. “What do you mean, naughty books? How do you know about those?”
“Oh, honey, I wasn’t born yesterday,” she scoffed. “You know we’re more open with each other than that.”
“I know that, and I also know you’re aware those books exist, but how did you know about the audio?” I stopped in my tracks. “Mom, you haven’t.”
A blush crept over her cheeks. “Just because I’m older doesn’t mean I’m boring, dear daughter.”
“Touche. Well.” I dropped my face into my hands. “Yes. He…does those.”
“Hmm,” she pondered. “I wonder if I know him.”
I jerked my head up. “No. Absolutely not. You’re not allowed to ever know his pseudonym. Ever.”
“Oh come on, Raven. That’s not fair, now is it?”
“It’s more than fair. You get to know him by his real name, Ryan.” I huffed.
“Fine. It’s not like names matter to me anyway, now, do they?” It was more of a statement than a question.
“Regardless, there’s something else.” I sighed.
She cocked her head. “What would that be, then?”
Deep down, I knew Mom wouldn’t judge me for who I dated or how I lived my life, but telling someone else about Ryan was challenging. I was afraid the excitement would drainfrom Mom’s eyes when she learned about his age. She’d watched the aftermath of someone older taking advantage of a younger person all those years ago. Watching me go through the aftermath of assault was one of the hardest things she’d been through and I knew what it did to her. I would never take advantage of anyone, but I didn’t want her to have any reservations.
“He’s twenty-five.”
“And? Why does that matter?”
I jerked my eyes to her face. “He’s a lot younger than me. You don’t think that’s an issue?”
“If he wasn’t a mature guy I know you wouldn’t have given him a second look, honey,” she said.
“Yeah, you’re right, but after everything we went through, I just want to make the right decision, you know?”
Mom leaned forward and took my hands in hers. “Listen, Raven. I think you haven’t let yourself get too comfortable with someone because of all the things you suffered. You’ve poured yourself into your career for the last decade, and I think it might be time to do some other things. I’m so proud of you for everything you’ve done for yourself and us. The firm is in a good spot. I know you like to work, but, honey, you’re allowed to have a life outside of it.”
I looked up at Mom with tears in my eyes. “I just don’t want to mess anything up for us, Mom. You’re right, I’m afraid of getting close to someone and getting hurt, but that’s why I wanted to talk to you. I’ve realized I want to try with him, even though I’ve only known him for a short time.”
“Well, if you already know that then why do you need my opinion? I’m sure he’s wonderful. You deserve everything, Raven. You’ve given so much, and now it's time for you to take back from life.”
My chest tightened with love and adoration for the womanin front of me. She was my best friend and the reason I was the person I had become. Before I went to college, I ran to her when I needed advice or help. I took on more of a leadership role in the family once I began my career. Maybe it was time I let go and listened to her again.
