Viv studied me for a moment before stepping back, nodding, then glancing at the tray. “It doesn’t have Oreos. Three stars.”
“Okay.” John pushed himself off the desk. “We aren’t here to discuss the academy’s cuisine. Selene and the other students are all unharmed. Vivian and Sydney, the two of you need to exit. You can wait for Sal in the hallway.”
Insert Headmaster. Fatherly traces had vanished.
“The two of us?” Viv asked and then pointed at Ender. “What about him?”
“He can stay,” John said.
I stood, placing a hand on Viv’s shoulder. “It’s okay. I’ll see you in the hallway.”
I leveled her my bestI'll tell you laterlook and she nodded, giving John the stink eye as she backed away.
Once they left, John resumed his stance against the desk, this time with his hands in his pockets. “Go over everything from the beginning of the day until now. Do not leave any details out.”
I sighed when he didn’t say another word and began to relive the day by explaining everything I had done. The entire time, John never mentioned why he had let Ender stay.
Chapter Fifty
Selene
Januarywaslonggone.February had come and gone. That day in Elemental Creations Lab impacted the academy more than the dark mage attack had, or at least that was how I felt. My dad checked in with me every day, Leah Murphy and Priscilla monitored me closely, and I was pulled from Elemental Creatures Lab. He had asked me to visit Nurse Adair once a week. He and Priscilla were both concerned about my health.
Professor Dickson privately tutored me outside of the class. Even creating elements had my nerves in a bundle, let alone creatures. My magic had short-circuited a few times, giving me the wrong element or nothing at all.
Chaos often popped his little head in through the outside windows of my classes, but he wasn’t allowed inside the buildings. The only place he was allowed in—theoretically—was my dorm room. Other students were uneasy in his presence.Even David kept his distance from the little dragon. April had been excited to meet a dragon until he had set her flower headband on fire.
My anger was always present, and I had to work hard to control it. I had been pushing everyone away the last two months, avoiding—more than typically—general human interaction. The intrusive thoughts ran rampant, and I had to work hard to stomp them down. My short fuse blew way too many times.
Even Vivian visited me less. I didn’t blame her. I had made a comment that referred to her as a coward for hiding her relationship with April. It had sent me in a guilt-ridden spiral ever since, even after apologizing. We did, however, still occasionally hang out on the roof. Sisters through and through, I supposed.
Sydney was my roommate, yet I rarely had more than a two-word conversation with her daily. I avoided talking to her. At least her nightmares had lessened.
Ender. Ender was my safe space even though something inside me felt broken. He was relentless and his presence brought a spark of light somewhere deep in my chest. Chaos had also stayed by my side, sending little fireballs my way at random times to cheer me up.
Every Tuesday and Thursday, I met with David for our sessions. His magic control had been improving, and his scent of burnt ash was growing stronger. Trainer Murphy had even approved of him removing his gloves. I had told him I shouldn’t be teaching him when I apparently couldn’t control my magic like I had thought I could. He protested, insisting that it made me an even better teacher. Besides that, I never hung out with any of my other friends. I ate—if I ate—in any part of the academy where I could find solitude.
Ender had convinced me to get rid of the grimoire. He physically handed it over to David and told him that he needed to turn it in to the headmaster, giving him a chance to come up with an explanation for why he had it. Ender did not want me or any other student to set foot in the basement.
I had informed my dad months ago that a student had made it into the basement over break; I never said which student. If there wasn’t a 24/7 guard placed at the door, I would be surprised. Chaos was much happier with it gone.
I wasn’t myself.Something is wrong with me.
I released a sigh, resting my head back against the bookcase. Aura slept quietly, her little fluffy body curled in my lap. I felt better around her. My dad worked at his desk, his pen moving swiftly over the paper. He never dismissed me nor had he asked me to leave and would even have food brought here.
I had learned his office was warded to keep unwanted visitors out, even if they unlocked the door. Apparently, it needed the presence of his blood to deactivate it. It explained why I was able to open the door instead of Sydney the night we snuck in. We shared the same bloodline.
The room slowly darkened as the sun set, the candles brightening the walls. Somewhere in my chest was a hard, messy, twisted knot that I couldn’t get rid of. The pain radiated against my back and wrapped around to my ribs. When I was with Aura, it dissipated to an aching throb. I was waging an internal war with myself, not wanting to give in to the voice in my head that told me to see if I could cause the flame from the candle on the shelf to catch the curtains on fire. My magic felt around the heat of the flame, surprising me it wasn’t phantom fire.
“What is your element?” I broke the quiet.
My dad looked up from his papers. He appeared to think for a moment before sitting up straight.
“No one I talked to seems to know,” I went on, “but based on the soot marks on your palms when we were in Singapore, I would assume fire, but magic doesn’t typically leave marks like that,” I rambled on.
“You are correct.” He surprised me when he stood and sat on the floor next to me. He reached out and stroked Aura, who purred in contentment. “When the element of fire is created, it does not leave carbon particles like a typical fire does. Utilizing non-created fire can cause a result of incomplete combustion of its hydrocarbon counterpart.”
I bit my lip, intently focusing on his words and deciphering their meaning.
