Before she can jerk away, I grab her wrist with my other hand, anchoring her close as the air between us thickens. I shouldn’t be so close to her, but she needs to know that I’m still in control.
And maybe I need to remind myself of that too.
I pull her closer, and something fractures inside me when her lips part with a soft gasp. “I could’ve let you rot away on the floor of this cage,” I remind her and hate myself for how close that came to being true.
Alina stares up into my eyes, one of her hands braced on my chest. “You should have.”
So ungrateful.
“Maybe so,” I say, keeping my grip tight on her wrist. A warning.
Her tongue pokes out for a second to drift across her bottom lip, distracting me for just a second. There’s been no bigger distraction than her lately.
Her stubbornness. Her eyes. Her body. Her fucking death wish.
“Keep our agreement, Gavriil. Don’t hurt Dominik,” she tells me, slowly and clearly like she knows she holds me captive. The way she even uses my name is a manipulation of her own making.
She isn’t pleading or asking like she should be. Like anyone else would be.
Alina’s tone is demanding. I want to lock her up in this cage and throw away the key. I want to kiss her for daring to stand her ground.
“I’ll do whatever I fucking want to him. Haven’t you figured that out yet?” I ask her, releasing her wrist only to capture her jaw, tilting her face up to mine.
Alina’s breath hitches as I hold her chin. Not hard enough to bruise but firm enough to make my point. “Oh, I have you all figured out, Gavriil,” she replies. “Desperation isn’t a good look on you. It’s pretty pathetic, actually,” she says and then brushes her beautiful bare breasts against my chest intentionally.
She’s dangling herself in front of me like offering a steak to a starving lion. Does she really think I’m that weak for her?
I drape my shirt over my shoulder with my other hand, unsure if I feel more frustrated or enticed thanks to the alcohol. My hand gravitates to her upper arm, slowly sliding down as my thumb brushes the side of her breast she thought to tempt me with. Once. Twice.
Alina gasps each time. Goosebumps rise on her skin. Like usual, her body automatically leans closer to me instead of shying away. On the third stroke, her eyes flutter shut a second before flying open to meet mine. “Get your disgusting hands off me.”
Her command is weak and half-hearted. If she really wanted me to let go and leave her alone, she’d push me away.
I lean closer to her face. “You don’t deserve my hands on you.”
Alina’s jaw drops, but she doesn’t get a word out before I release her and shut the cage door behind me. She draws in a sharp inhale and wraps her arms around herself, shielding me from a view that’ll be on my mind all night long.
I have to force myself to leave the room before I throw open that cage door and lose control again. I’m already fucking up inways that I normally wouldn’t. Wanting to hold her, to have her sleep in my bedwithme. Letting her insult me and yell at me without any consequences.
I don’t know what the hell I’m doing anymore, and that’s all because of her.
I haven’t felt this out of control and uneasy since Dominik and I were kids and our father decided to become our biggest threat. It took me forever to find my footing and gain control back then.
I can’t afford that struggle now. Not with a war on the horizon.
Especially not for the woman who still belongs to my brother.
16
Alina
The clock is no longer just ticking.It’s feels like a knife pressing against my throat.
I need to break Gavriil before he finishes what he started with me.
Even if that means losing parts of myself I won’t get back.
My eyes settle on the closed bedroom door as I huddle in the corner of the cage with my back against the bars, knees pulled to my bare chest on the mattress with the thin blanket covering me. Valentin hardly guards me anymore.
