And apparently, there’s nothing I can do to change that.
Taking a deep breath through my nose, I straighten my spine. “Fine. If you want me to go back to Dominik, I will.”
Gavriil hesitates, and the desire to kiss him again crashes down on me like a tidal wave. He doesn’t want me to leave. I know it.
So, why won’t he just admit it? Why won’t he just say so?
My heart races as Gavriil takes my hand and lifts it to his lips to kiss my knuckles.
“Goodbye, Alina,” he says before releasing me.
My heart sinks as my hand drifts back down to my side.
That’s it.
He won’t say it.
He won’t show me what he actually feels for me.
“Goodbye, Gavriil,” I say with a heavy sigh as I start toward the door.
Just before I reach for the doorknob, he calls out softly, “Wait.”
I turn around just as he slips his hand into his pocket. He pulls out his necklace and Dominik’s, the chains dangling them from his fingers.
“I want you to have these. A piece of him and a piece of me.”
My heart sinks as I stare at the necklaces and their familiar charms. This is all that he can give me of himself? A necklace that his father gave them, putting a huge burden on their shoulders?
When Gavriil comes closer like he’s going to clip the necklaces around my neck, I take a step back. This conversation isn’t over yet. It can’t be. And I know that once those necklaces are on me, he’ll be done talking.
“Will you find us when the war is over?” I ask.
The side of Gavriil’s mouth tilts up a little, and I finally make out an expression that fills his face.
Bittersweet.
“No.”
My throat grows tight. Of course, he’s going to pull a move like that. A sacrifice.
Does he think that’s what I want? Does he think that’s the noble thing to do? The only thing he can do to atone for all his sins?
Frustration burns under my skin, and quite a few choice words come to mind because he’s choosing to stay away. It’s not a necessity. It’s not out of his control because nothing is out of his control.
He’s making meso angrybecause I don’t want him to run headfirst into this war and get himself killed for being stubborn. Surprisingly enough, I don’t want to move forward with my life without him in it.
Despite everything that’s happened, everything he’s done, Gavriil somehow managed to carve out his own little spot in my heart. My soul.
And this may be the last time I ever see him.
Unable to quell the need swelling in my chest, I throw my arms around his neck and crush my lips against his.
Gavriil staggers back a step out of surprise, but he bounces back quickly, his arms winding around my back to pull me closer.
I tilt my head, our mouths perfectly melding together as I push my fingers into his hair. I kiss him until I can’t breathe and then some, not wanting to break apart. Not wanting to come up for air.
I just want to breathe him in as much as I can.
