I went for massages and to the spa to get the attention I needed. Others went to feel special in this way. One really wasn’t better than the other as long as nothing was in excess and everyone had a handle on where the lines were.
That was just not always the reality and why places became so sleezy.
But I also felt more than most, and especially humans, so maybe in another life I would have made a fantastic counselor. It made me think of another way for demons to maybe branch out into social services. Something to think about later.
I listened to one guy talk on and on about his girlfriend and their new puppy. Unlike my experience with the twins, it was not a good one for him. He hadn’t even wanted the dog and now itwas a disaster for him. She was letting it do whatever and the living environment was beyond gross when he liked things clean and tidy. She excused everything and he was ready to bail.
“How long have you been together?” I asked him after sensing the grief more than anything else. “You normally come in twice a month with your buddies after work?”
He blinked at me. “How did you know that?”
“You told me or one of the girls did in the rundown on regulars,” I brushed off.
“Yeah, once or twice a month, and she’s cool with it as long as I don’t get lap dances alone or touch.” He chuckled, a goofy look on his face. “She’d hand me my balls and not put up with that shit. She’s amazing and strong like that.”
“Okay, so she’s a good one, and this is your chance to fight for her instead of wasting what you’ve had,” I guided.
“She won’t listen to me and—”
“Are you telling her what to do or are you telling her how you feel and that the change isn’t working for you?” I challenged, nodding when he frowned. “It’s all in how you frame it, love. If she’s a strong one, then you can’t attack her. Maybe she realizes she made a mistake and now can’t admit it because you’re being a jerk about it.
“Maybe she feels trapped.Maybethis was a test run about what kind of father you’d be and she’s spinning out at how you’re handling it.” I nodded when he did a double take. “I’ve heard some do that. A puppy as the step before kiddos and everything falls apart when they realize they’ll be a married single mother.”
“A kid isn’t a damn dog I didn’t want,” he argued.
“Agreed, but something is going on here if you guys have been good until now,” I told him firmly. “And doesn’t she deserve for you to find out? Doesn’t she deserve that understanding from you after all the love she’s given you? Yousaid she’s done a lot for you and you’re going to just bail? Does she deserve that?”
He looked like the pup that got swatted and he pouted and nursed his drink. “No.”
“No, she doesn’t,” I said in a teasing moping voice. “So what do you do?”
He huffed, a bit buzzed and honestly adorable. “If I knew that, I wouldn’t be asking you.”
Fair. I even admitted that and patted his arm. “Yeah, you’re at the eye of the storm, so that’s fair. Okay, so you bring her flowers and ask if you guys can get back on the same page. Ask if you can go see a couple’s counselor and—”
“We’re not married.”
“So?” I snorted when he frowned. “I didn’t say a marriage counselor. I said couple’s counselor. Go talk to someone. You’ve been together over a year and you see a future with her, right?” I waited until he nodded. I gestured around the club. “You got money for nights like this and you guys just took a trip, yeah?”
He nodded again and then sighed. “So we have money for a few sessions even if insurance doesn’t cover it. Yeah, we like nice dinners and—how do I find one?”
“That I can’t help you with, but I’m very sure there are social media groups that can recommend people,” I told him. “You’re scared to ask because of the stigma and she deserves better than that.” I raised an eyebrow when he tried to defend himself. “You’d have no problem asking for a recommendation where to buy her a ring when you were ready, right? Why this?”
I was impressed when he was genuinely disappointed with himself for not having seen it that way as well. I told him that it made him a gem that he was willing to correct himself and grow instead of dig in his heels and excuse his bad behavior. It made him better than most.
And I put myself in that bucket because wealldid that at times. It was something I was working on as well.
We all should.
What tickled me was that the next guy I sat with rambled about not wanting kids… So the tie-in to my last chat wasn’t lost on me at all. He’d been clear since the beginning that he didn’t want them ever, but now his wife declared they were going to have them and was throwing a fit he wouldn’t get on board.
She’d really raked him over the coals and I was annoyed with what I was hearing. Yes, I was only hearing his side, but it was different when I could feel desires. His told a lot more than his words.
He desired not to sit for another lecture he was selfish and didn’t love her.
He desired to change how he felt or that he could flip a switch inside of him to want kids.
He wanted tomatureto want kids like she kept telling him.
