“Currently, I feel on edge.I feel ready to take action at any given moment.I’m not sad yet, and I’m scared that it makes me crazy.”
Betsy stood up from the chaise next to the window.“Well, if you aren’t hurting, we might as well spend your last night here wisely.”
“I am pissed at Jesse.Other than that, I feel okay.How would we do that?”
“It’s a girl’s night!We haven’t had the chance to have a sleepover all summer.We are long overdue for some makeovers, boy talk, fashion shows, and some good old TV.”
Betsy dragged me into the bathroom, where we did each other’s makeup.It took me a couple of tries to do hers with my shaking hands, but in the end, she looked pretty.Her auburn hair made her look bold in a stunning way.I gave her a darker shade of red lipstick and a smokey eye.She painted my face more subtly with pink lip gloss and tan eyeshadow.The little bit of makeup went a long way.It brought back some color to my face.
We went through her mother’s closet like we used to and picked out some funky dresses to wear.Then, we walked down the attic’s middle, sashaying like we were runway models.I couldn’t help but laugh when Betsy posed and blew me kisses.
I wasn’t sure if should have been enjoying life.James was dead, and I was prancing around like nothing happened.Who did I think I was?I should have been holding my mom or crying my eyes out, reminiscing about him.Despite my family’s open wound, I was laughing.Something was wrong with me.I curled up again, petrified by the world.
Betsy asked, “Why don’t we put on pajamas and watch television on the couch downstairs?”
“All right,” I said.
We sank into the couch’s cushions, mindlessly watching the random programs that were on.When the sun rose, I would have to leave Moose Creek early, without James and without saying goodbye to Darren, as a cold, empty body without a soul.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Drive
Song: Landslide- FleetwoodMac
March 7th, 1974
James’s ruby red 1951 Chevrolet 3100 pickup became mine.He’d loved that pickup with all his heart, and since I was fifteen, I could get my license soon.Before James passed away, I didn’t think I would have a car of my own until I was older.I still remembered the first time he let me drive it.
Harold Hayes: You should write this story too.
Penny: Don’t you think people will get bored of me re-hashing the past?
Harold Hayes: Do I look bored to you?
Penny: No.I guess not.
