“Oh, dragons absolutely steal children,” Zan says. “I’m happy to blame Kameyan priests for many things, but they didn’t invent that one, even if they have embellished it. Dragon society is deeply fucked up.”
Huh. Not what I was expecting him to say, though it strikes me that Zan is attempting to make me think of him in the worst possible light and I’m not sure why.
Then again, Isawhis hunger, before he remembered to veil it.
He’s no more had the luxury of acting on his wants than I have. How much harder would it be to act against your instincts when they’ve been reinforced for five hundred years?
“Is it true that dragons can’t have children without humans?” I ask.
To my surprise, he answers me directly. “Female dragons can, and their offspring are always dragons. That’s why you’ve never fought a female dragon—they’re not permitted to leave the eyries, lest something befall them.”
“I didn’t actually know there were female dragons,” I admit.
Zan nods. “And if anyone asks, I will deny it. I have no intention of making the worldlesssafe for them, when they’re already so trapped.”
I nod. “I will keep the secret no matter what.”
A quick, habitual motion with my hands flares my magic, making this an official vow.
Zan’s eyes widen, and he inclines his head deeply in appreciation for my commitment.
I’m not sure why. He must have realized I wouldn’t tell anyone, surely, or else he’d never have said anything. The vow is merely an acknowledgement that I understand the weight of what he’s told me.
Maybe he didn’t expect me to be sympathetic, given the subject matter, but how could I not be?
Then Zan continues, “Male dragons, on the other hand, are more common, and we can breed with humans. Human women mostly don’t birth dragons, but when they do, we take them to raise among dragons and never have contact with their mothers again. Or any of the human offspring. If they don’t, we still leave, because we will have to try again with another human, and any resources at our disposal we save for the next possible broodmare. Young male dragons are released from the eyries for this purpose, you see, and until we return with a child, we are not considered adults. And until we are considered adults, we are not permitted to mate.”
Wow is there alotto unpack there.
That was not the change in my foundational understanding of the world that I thought was on the agenda for today.
“I’m beginning to see where your disdain is coming from,” I say as evenly as I can manage. I’m a master at emotional regulation, but Iamstill Wrath-powered, and that is a whole bombshell of yikes. “If mating for dragons isn’t a matter of sex, what is it?”
Zan won’t meet my eyes. “You know dragons are vulnerable when they return to dragon form.”
“Yes.”
“Without a mate, a male dragon must live in the eyrie for security or be trapped in human form. With a mate, you can draw strength from your partner, and the power required to sustain a dragon is considerable—that’s why our scales are so sought after, after all. And it’s also why our mates can only be dragons.”
I feel a pang at that, which is patently ridiculous. I barely know him. And in any case, he’s explaining to me why hehasn’tdone this.
Anger at my own self flares, and I squash it ruthlessly. I amnotgoing there, trapping him with my barely-even-fledged expectations like I have been trapped before.
His hunger isn’t for me as a person.
Zan continues, “To be free to take your dragon form and go where you please, you have to have a mate.”
“But you haven’t returned,” I say, “for at least five hundred years.”
Zan nods. “We’re probably about the same age, technically speaking. When I saw you for the first time, I’d only recently been turned loose tobreed.”
The amount of scorn he puts on that last word I feel in my bones.
“And you still haven’t.”
Zan does look at me then, and his anger is visible, too. “I am uninterested in abandoning women and children for a horrific metric of adulthood. If I am a child in the eyes of those who consider that action worth merit or a rogue for refusing to conform to it, so be it.”
So, so much about the world I never knew. Never had a chance to know.
