“Are people really not going to eat ice cream anymore if I’m the one making it?”
“Too soon to say, I think,” Sunani says quietly. “It’s going to take people time to process what they feel. I don’t know how much luck you’ll have today.”
“We,” I correct automatically.
Zan has gotten that difference betweenweandyouorthemunder my skin.
Sunani doesn’t agree or disagree immediately, which makes me worry about how she’s feeling about sitting here with me. I didn’t mean to bully her into it, but maybe she felt like she couldn’t say no to me, which is theoppositeof what I wanted—
“I think you’ve misunderstood how popular I am,” Sunani finally says. “People just want me for my looks. They don’t respect me. So having me at your side here... I don’t think it’s going to help you as much as you want.”
I remember how everyone in the meetings took notice any time Sunani spoke. Like the fact that she was speaking at all made her words more worth attending to.
“I think you might be wrong about that,” I say slowly, “but that’s not the main reason, anyway. Or constructing the booth.”
“I assumed it was to piss people off who will feel like they are entitled to me.”
Gods, she’s sharp. “I mean, yes, but in a more basic way it’s because if anyone gives you trouble they’ll find out what it’s like when they’ve pissedmeoff, and I was really looking forward to that.” I sigh. “Maybe I scared them off too hard at the meeting already. Annoying.”
Sunani studies me for a moment. “What exactly did Teren tell you about me?”
“Both too much and not enough,” I say wryly. “In retrospect I think he understood your strength as so obvious he didn’t think it bore mentioning.”
Sunani blinks, then shakes her head. “I’m not sure he’s aware of how I feel about... politics.”
Or him, she doesn’t say, but I hear it anyway.
“He may realize more than you’ve given him credit for,” I say. “But Teren did specifically say that he didn’t think it was fair to put you in more danger.”
“Then hedefinitelydoesn’t understand enough,” Sunani snaps.
Oh ho! “Maybe you should tell him that.”
Sunani considers that. “Maybe.” Then she looks me in the eye and asks, “Did he tell you about my condition?”
The way she says that makes me think it’s not something we’ve been talking about.
I shake my head slowly.
“It’s not a secret,” Sunani says with a shrug. Wow am I beginning to hate that extremely normal gesture. “I have a chronic illness that is... manageable, now, but it will worsen over time. But it’s largely invisible to people.”
Well that provides some perspective. She knows that however much people want her for her beauty now, not only may they not stand with her once she gets older, she believes they’ll consider her a burden.
The Order was both more and less excited about me as a child, when I was all potential for molding in their hands.
Or so they thought.
“I genuinely can’t imagine that affecting Teren’s feelings, if that’s what you’re getting at,” I tell her.
“But does he know that it does matter, if he didn’t tell you?” Sunani asks. “Many people just act as though it doesn’t already affect my life—”
“Oh, no. I know I’ve only known Teren for days, but please trust an ancient sage’s intuition on this one. He knows that some things are not his to tell.” I scowl. “And he may have learned a little too recently whatishis to tell.”
Sunani cocks her head to the side. Really thinking about that.
Then she nods, slowly.
“Me, too,” she says quietly.
