Doubt overtakes his handsome features, and he recoils slightly, understanding he went too far. I can see that he tries to find something to say, but with the guys around us, there isn’t much he can do, is there?
“Thanks for your help,” I press, hoping to put an end to this weird moment. “I’m sorry I wasted your time with something so trivial.” Although I’m talking about the script, it feels like more.
And I think he catches that because something sad passes in his eyes. “It’s fine. We all have our off days,” he brushes off.
“Try an offmonth,” I mumble, returning my attention to the screen.
Although I expect him to get up and leave, he doesn’t. Not right away, at least. He lingers there for a few seconds, and I wonder if Mace and Joseph can feel how charged the air gets around us. It takeseverything in me not to look at him again, but I force myself to because I can’t take more of his pity.
Yes, sleeping with my boss was the stupidest thing I’ve ever done. Yes, he warned me from the start. Yes, I knew I’d get hurt. But somewhere along the way, I began hoping that maybe our insane chemistry, the bond we shared, and our oh-so-perfect match in bed might lead to more than just a sex thing.
Whatever is holding him back seems to vanish as he stands from his chair and rolls it away. It’s only when he’s gone that I allow myself to breathe again. That wasn’t so bad, was it? We talked. We exchanged a few words. That’s progress, right?
But toward what? Mutual tolerance? That sounds awfully impersonal. But it’s still better than whatever’s going on right now.
What’s left of my morning is spent much more efficiently, and I work without a single issue. Mason is the one to pull me out of it when lunchtime comes.
Like every day, I reluctantly join them. I vaguely listen to their conversation as I eat my buttery noodles and rotisserie chicken thigh. They’re excited about the office Halloween party this Friday. I decided a while back that I wouldn’t go, even if it sounds like I’ll miss one hell of an evening. But I’m already forcing myself to come here every day for work. There’s no way I’ll add a Friday evening to my struggle.
“What are you coming as, sis?” Mason asks me out of the blue.
Shit. Well, thankfully, I have already prepared an excuse and will go to Portland to visit my parents for the weekend.
“Um… I’m not coming, actually.”
The guys answer with a collective protest. “No, you have to come!” Brian insists. “You have to see my costume!”
“Will it be better than last year’s?” Mason skeptically asks.
“Last year was on you, guys. My costume was amazing.”
“You came dressed as Robin Hood but then claimed you were Nammota,” Oliver points out.
“I had an Anonymous mask on and was holding a keyboard the whole time! And I even had a sticker that said ‘Hello, I’m Nammota.’”
“That’s not what a legendary hacker looks like!” Mace protests.
“Then what does he look like?”
“If the world knew, Nammota would be in jail, bitch. So, stop pretending your costume wasn’t dog shit, and stop changing the subject! Andy, boo, you have to come.”
Now that the attention is back on me, I wince. “I’m sorry, I alreadyhave things planned, and—”
Mason interrupts. “Oh, come on, girl. We’ll cheer you up. It’ll be fun. Everyone will be there, and the bar we’re going to has, like, four hundred different beers.”
He knows me too well because that beer argument almost works. An evening out with friends could do me some good. And if everyone’s going, it’ll be crowded, and I might barely cross paths with Lex. Knowing him, he’ll spend the evening in a dark corner anyway, brooding silently.
The guys catch my slight hesitation and smile in anticipated victory.
“I don’t even have a costume,” I try, still hesitant.
“Oh, please. You can whip one out in five minutes. We’re not going for the costumes; we’re going for the fun.”
“We were just talking about how great all of your costumes will be,” I remind Steven, skeptical.
“Yeah, but we’d rather have you costumeless than not have you at all, right?” Brian, Steven, and Joseph nod, agreeing with Mason.
I let out a breathy sigh. Four against one isn’t a fair fight. For the first time since we sat, I peer at Oli. Things are still awkward as hell between us, so when he offers me a small smile and a nod before saying, “You should come. It’ll be fun,” I lose my internal battle.
