Because humor is my best defense against embarrassment, the next thing my mouth spews is, “As fun as that was, let’s never do it again.”
It takes everything in me not to cringe at my own words. To my relief, a semblance of a smile stretches the man’s lips, and… Fuck, he truly is devastatingly handsome.
“Let’s not,” he answers, his baritone voice doing something primal to my insides.
The doors finally open for me, and before I can melt into a puddle at his feet, I wiggle my way out of this tedious hell. Once out, I take a deep breath, my lungs filling with fresh air again. Using the stairs next time comes to mind, but I’m too out of shape for that.
The ass those stairs would give me, though.
After a quick look at my surroundings, I silently rejoice when I notice people wearing casual clothes. Behind the reception desk is a gorgeous blonde typing on a laptop. She looks intimidating, especially with her septum piercing and immaculate makeup. The closer I get to her, the more I feel like an Oompa-Loompa showing up for duty.
I stand there, smiling awkwardly, but she doesn’t notice me. So, I clear my throat to make my presence known. She immediately lifts her eyes, and her gaze takes me in up and down as one of her perfectly drawn eyebrows rises slightly.
“Welcome to Kelex. How may I help you?”
“Hi,” I say, my voice a little shaky. “I start today, and I’m wondering if you could give me some directions.”
“Yes, of course. What’s your name, and what department will you work in?”
“I’m, uh, Andrea. Andrea Walker. And I’m with the development team.”
The woman frowns and looks up from her screen. “You’reAndyWalker.” I nod, surprised my name means something to her. “We weren’t expecting… We thought you were a… man.”
I do my best to look innocent, batting my eyes at the receptionist when I, in fact, did my best to keep the lines blurred. Anything to make sure I’d get my dream job. The receptionist apparently realizes she is staring and shakes her head to snap out of it.
“Sorry, you just really surprised me there. The nerds from dev have been talking about you a lot. I doubt they expect you to be a woman. And with this,” she explains with a soft laugh, pointing at my shirt, “they will all be at your feet by the end of the day.”
I smile humbly, definitely reassured now. We geeks are pretty serious about our superheroes.
“You’ll probably need to drop by HR first,” she explains. “They’re right upstairs, fifth door on the left.”
Before I can panic about getting into an elevator again, I notice a door that must lead to a staircase. “I’ll do that, thank you!”
“No problem. Come back when you’re done, and I’ll take you to the Troll’s Lair.”
As I journey toward the upper floor, my mind drifts back to the attractive man in the elevator. My front is still warm, as if the ghost of his presence lingers on me. Unless he’s only visiting, we might meet again on future elevator rides. One more reason to look forward to coming to work.
The HR woman is lovely, and because she’s had my legal name for a few days, she isn’t surprised that I’m a woman, and I don’t have to justify myself. I never lied about my actual name, but I did sign off as “Andy” everywhere since I almost exclusively go by that.
Within a few minutes, I’ve signed everything, so she hands me my version of each document and a copy of the company’s rules and regulations.
I’m quick to return downstairs with everything sorted, and this time, the blonde at reception welcomes me back with a smile. “All good?” she asks.
I can’t shake the grin from my face. “Yes, it’s official. I’m a full-stack developer here.”
“Congratulations! I’ll introduce you to the nerds.” She stands up and is much taller than I expected. She extends her hand, a kind smile on her lips. “I’m Dakota, by the way. I work with the graphic design team. Our receptionist called in sick this morning, and I drew the short straw. Come, the Troll’s Lair awaits.” With a gesture, she invites me to follow her.
Contrary to upstairs where it’s all corridors and closed offices, most of this floor is open, with only a handful of enclosed workspaces. The desks are huge, and everyone has plenty of room to move around. The whole place is very bright, with vivid hues here and there.
We get to a closed part of the floor and stop before a glass door. I smile at the various notes taped on it.Don’t tap the glass, it scaresthe geeks, one reads.Please, don’t feed the trolls. They are on a special diet, and under, someone added with a ballpoint pen,of Cheetos and Red Bull. Then,Do not trespass during Counter-Strike sessions. Trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again—then Steven will T-bag them. That last one makes me chuckle, and I already know I’ll like these guys.
“Are you ready?” Dakota asks, gripping the handle. I nod, telling myself I will do just fine.
With great energy, she pushes the door open. “Listen up, you animals!” she announces as we enter. The five men sitting inside lift their heads from their computers, glancing in our direction. “This is Andrea Walker, a.k.a. ‘the script whisperer,’ as you brainiacs have been calling her for the past three weeks.” The nickname makes me grin with pride.
Several jaws drop as they process that information. It seems that hiding the fact that I have boobs and a vagina was more of a scam than I thought.
“You virgins might not be familiar with this, but yes, Andy is a female specimen of our kind,” Dakota explains with sarcasm.
