“I’m sorry,” I say, hooking my arms around his neck. “I swear we’ll find another time for it. But I can’t take the risk of Tamika not understanding.” He’s still silent, which makes me realize how much he looked forward to this weekend together. “I’ll make it up to you.”
He finally reacts by wrapping his arms around me to hold me close. “Next weekend, you’re mine.” I fight the urge to tell him I’m his every day of the week. “And Wednesday, you come home with me.”
I nod, agreeing to his terms, and we exchange a quick kiss.
Tamika is on the couch when we come out. She stares at us with confusion and shock, and I can’t help but grimace. Lex gives her an awkward hand wave as I accompany him to the door. With a heavy heart, I open it for him. During a few silent seconds, he stands in the doorway, the regret in his eyes crushing my soul.
“I’ll see you on Monday, then,” he says, bending for a kiss.
I recoil out of habit, slightly distressed. Lex fails to hide his irritation. Shit, I’m not handling this well. “I’ll call you tomorrow,” I say, squeezing his arm.
Without another word, he’s out. As I watch him walk away, a twinge of guilt twists my guts. Shit, I can’t let him go like this. I impulsively rush after him, barefoot.
“Lex, wait!” I call. He stops and turns around, surprised.
Before he can anticipate it, I throw myself in his arms and bring him in for a long and intense goodbye kiss. He’s going home alone because of me; I’m not denying him one last embrace.
I move away from him and give him an affectionate smile. “Talk to you tomorrow,” I promise before returning to my door. He’s still standing there when I’m back inside, so I shoo him with a hand gesture. A silent laugh, a shake of his head, and he walks away.
“I’ll shower, and then we can talk,” I sign to Tami once I return inside. There’s no escaping it, so, following a long shower to rinse Lex off of me and a change of clothes, I dismiss my cowardice and sit cross-legged in the armchair opposite her.
She must have already thought of what she wants to ask first because she doesn’t waste a second to raise her hands and sign, “Is he the man you’ve been seeing?” I nod. “When did it start?”
“We first kissed during the evening we celebrated the sale of my app. We started having sex the night I went MIA.”
“So it’s not been that long. Does anyone else know?”
“Only Kate, I think. Maybe Kevin,” I admit.
“Are you going to tell people?”
“We’re waiting to see how it goes first.”
“And how has it been going?”
“It’s been… ups and downs. It’s complicated, with work and all. Lex is also a very complex person.”
“I can imagine that,” she signs with humor. She takes a short break, thinking of what to ask next. “Do you like him?”
The question surprises me, even though it’s to be expected. “I really do. He can be very sweet and touching. I love spending time with him, outside of… you know.”
“I would never have imagined you two being a thing, but now I kinda see it,” she eventually signs. “I would ask how the sex is, but you’re practically limping.” She’s mischievous when she signs the rest. “And I saw what he’s working with, you lucky girl.”
I blush profusely, embarrassed to have such details about my sex life out in the open. Tami isn’t usually this bold, but I can tell she’s still a little intoxicated from the Kelex party.
“Could you not tell anyone?” I sign with pleading eyes. “People will assume I’m doing this because he’s my boss, or he’s taking advantage of me… That sort of thing.”
“But you’ll have to tell people at some point, no?”
“Yes, but I want to make sure it’s for something solid, not a passing fling. I can endure the judging looks if I have something worth fighting for.”
“I get it,” she signs with a sympathetic smile. “I’m so glad I ditched the club. This is so much better.”
We talk for a while longer, and Tamika asks me a few more questions. I don’t want to make it weird for her or Lex, so I keep the details to a minimum. Then it’s time to sleep, and we go to our respective rooms.
Once I’m back in mine, I wince at the messy state of my bed. The scarves are still tied to the bedposts, the covers are rumpled and undone, and there’s a patch of wetness in the middle of it. Shit, he made me soak the sheets.
Just so it’s not only because I’m lazy, I tell myself I’ll change the bedding in the morning so I can sleep with Lex’s scent etched to my sheets. It’s so potent that when I slip under the covers, I can almost imagine he’s right there with me. And it makes me regret not going with him to his place, as intended.
