Page 12 of The Desire Variable


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“That dick!” she protests with an appalled face, finally getting my vibe. “I hope you proved that idiot wrong.”

“You know I did. I made him regret it.”

“That’s my girl!” There is a short silence, and I look away from my phone to my messy room. “Did you finish unpacking?”

“No. I still need to muster the courage to even start.”

“You’ve been there for three days. Stop procrastinating and get your lazy ass to work.”

“I can’t tonight. I have plans,” I pretend.

“What plans?”

“I’m gonna Netflix and chill.”

“I know you mean Netflix and actually chill,” she answers, not duped. “Since you haven’t unpacked, you most definitely haven’t found Idris yet.”

Idris, named after one of the sexiest men to have ever lived, Idris Elba, is my clitoral massager, my most trusted companion in the darkest hours of the night. I’m a little offended, even though she has every reason to assume I’m not talking about an actual human.

“Maybe I meant with a real man.”

“No, you didn’t. You never do.”

“But I can’t unpack right now… I’m exhausted.”

“Well then, tonight you rest, but tomorrow you unpack, and I want a picture to prove you did it.”

“I swear I will,” I promise. My phone buzzes in my hand, and on the top of my screen, I see it’s my mother. “Mom’s calling, I have to go. Love you!”

She barely has time to reply before I hang up and take my mother’s call, eager to hear her comforting and familiar voice. With a broad smile, I hold the phone to my ear. “¡Hola mamá! ¿Cómo estás?”

“I’m great,mija. And you, how are you?” she continues in Spanish.

“I’m great too.Except I miss you guys.”

“We miss you too,” she says with palpable emotion. I hear my father’s voice close to the phone. “Your dad says hi.”

“Hi, Dad!” I yell, hoping he can hear me.

“Hey, peanut!” He definitely has his ear pressed against my mom’s phone. “We’re very proud of you, you know?”

A twinge of melancholy tightens my heart. My parents and I are close, especially since I only moved out of the family house three years ago when I got my first proper job. It was still in Portland, though, so I’ve never lived so far from them.

Both my mother’s parents were first-generation Mexican immigrants. I barely got to know my abuelo, but my abuela, Maria Carmen, has been living with us for the past twenty years or so. On my dad’s side, everyone was cut off before I was born—no racist bigots allowed in this family.

My parents are the cutest couple I know, and I wish for everyone to find what they have. Thirty-something years together and Michael and Isabella Walker are still smitten with one another. My father’s lovinggaze when he looks at my mom is why my standards are so high. I won’t settle for anything less than that.

I tell them about my day and how great things will be. I, of course, don’t tell them about my frustrating boss and the confusing thoughts he triggers in me, but I do tell them about the few people I met.

Despite a rocky start, today was great.

Chapter 04

I’m still not used to the abnormally loud AC unit that rattles all night, so I don’t have the most restful sleep. My studio is horrible, but I’m nothing if not adaptable. Once I’m settled in and know this city better, I’ll start looking for another place.

But the direct line to Pike is handy, and I arrive a solid ten minutes early for my second day. On my way to the Troll’s Lair, I stop by the break room to make myself a cup of coffee, which speaks volumes about my tired state. I despise the taste of it.

I’m adding a fifth spoonful of sugar when a masculine voice says, “Would you like some more coffee with that sugar?” It’s Oliver, looking at me with a teasing smile. Now that I have slept on it, he’s rather attractive. Not in the classical way, but there’s something kind about him that’s reassuring and enticing.