“And I don’t want you starving yourself out of spite.”
She laughs, but it’s far from genuine. “You think I’m being spiteful?”
“I think you’re trying very hard not to feel anything… including hunger.”
Her stare is scathing, but she crosses her arms. “And if the urge to murder you is the thing I’m repressing?”
I snort at that. “Then I’ll consider it progress.”
After another beat of silence, she huffs out a breath. “I want to go back.”
“And we will,” I tell her, moving over to the armchair and dropping myself into it. “After the weekend is up. The tradition says at least two nights and two days, if not more. Technically, we’re on day one.”
Lila’s brows furrow, going rigid again. “I don’t give a damn about the tradition, and you’re obviously miserable too. So why make me stay?”
Sighing to myself, I reach for the lighter meant for the various candles around the room that haven’t even been touched yet. I mindlessly play with it in my grasp. “Because the pack needs to think we followed the rules, even if, well…”
She scoffs at that and turns away, arms folded over her chest a bit tighter. “I want to see Astrid.”
“I know.”
At my tone, as if forgetting herself, Lila lets her shoulders soften before pulling them tight again. The cold front between us gets even stronger despite how badly I want to push it out.
But she needs time, and if I keep pushing her, she’ll snap. Whatever little progress I’ve made will go up in smoke.
Eventually, she pushes her way out the front door, and as tempted as I am to call her back in, I let her go.
In her absence, my wolf feels more restless than ever. It just wants to be near her, wanting to soothe her more than anything.
But I force it down and remind myself that my desires don’t matter right now.
Lila’s comfort matters, as well as her safety.
Dragging a hand down my face, I force out a breath to try and steady myself through the storm of everything kicking up in my system at the same time.
I didn’t want it to be her… the girl I hurt, the woman I wronged, and the mate I never thought I’d have for myself.
However, fate never asked me for my opinion, and it never will.
As much as I still want to doubt it, I can’t.
I want her. I need her.
And if giving her space is the one thing that might help her warm up to me, then so be it.
I can wait, even if it’s agonizing.
Chapter 11 - Lila
I spent most of the morning pretending Caleb doesn’t exist, but it’s only effective for so long.
The cabin is barely big enough for two people to carry on with their day in semi-privacy, so I try to linger outside. The fresh air helps, at least, but it doesn’t seem to take long for him to appear again.
Not right in my face, but close enough for me to know he’s keeping an eye on me, even from afar.
I drift from the back porch to the stream not far from the cabin, trying my hardest to just seem contemplative, or like I’m biding my time, but truthfully, I’m trying to think of a way out.
Most of the ideas don’t stick, but I keep coming back to the same common denominator. I just need to get to the house and get Astrid. Maybe then I can just run and hope for the best. Maybe I can put everything behind us and move on completely.
