I’d never even had alcohol before I came to my first party at the clubhouse, but Blade is quick to shove whatever substances are available at me. It keeps me compliant, especially because saying no isn’t an option.
If I look like an undercover cop, he will kill me without a second thought.
I’m not.
I’m just a stupid girl who fell for the wrong man. But now that I know I’m pregnant, I can’t stay here. Not only do I refuse to subject my child to the garbage that I’ve seen since moving into the clubhouse, I don’t trust that he wouldn’t push me into using during my pregnancy to keep me here.
I’m not sure what clicked.
Maybe it was when the smell of liquor made me queasy, but I sat down and counted out when my last heat was. That meant another heat should have come four, almost five weeks ago. That was when I knew I had to take a test.
I never expected the result to pop up saying that I was pregnant, but it did, and I’ve been walking a fine line since.
Blade can’t know.
He’ll never let me leave if he finds out I’m carrying his baby. And he’s eventually going to catch on to the fact I quit everything. That alone will make him suspicious that I’m working with the cops.
A loud banging fills the air, making me jump. I was headed to the bathroom, but I detour to answer the door instead.
It’s technically Blade’s room. I’ve just been in here with him for the last six months. Once my mom found out where I was spending my spare time, she kicked me out. He was more than happy to take me in. Though I now realize that was because he enjoyed seeing that I destroyed my relationship with my family to be with him.
They might take me back, but it would be the first place he would look.
I pull the door open, frowning at Magnum. “What’s up?”
“He told me to come get you,” he says, grimacing. He’s not as bad as most of the guys here, and I wish he would get out while he still has the chance.
He won’t, though.
His entire family is part of the club.
That means he’s stuck here for life.
“I’m really not feeling well,” I say weakly.
I don’t know why I even bother.
Mag doesn’t have the authority to override an order from his president. If he went back out there without me, all that would do is to get him into trouble. Then Blade would come for me himself.
The music is so loud that it rattles the floorboards as I make my way out into the living room. There’s a bar lining the back wall, couches and a pool table on the left, and a big-ass table on the right. The floor is sticky, making me regret that I didn’t stop to put on my shoes.
Hell, I was ready to climb into bed.
I’m in one of Blade’s T-shirts and a pair of sleep shorts, while all the other women are dressed up like they’re going out to a club.
The first time I came to a party at the clubhouse, I was dressed the exact same way. The thought of catching one of the brothers’ eyes was exciting,let alone having the president of the MC interested in me.
If I could go back in time, I’d literally shake myself. I’d scream in my own face to get the fuck out while I still could. It wouldn’t change my mind, but I’d at least try.
“He’s over by the bar,” Mag says, nodding in that direction.
My jaw falls as I spot my supposed boyfriend. He’s balls deep in one of the club girls. He was a lot more discreet about his cheating when we first got together, or maybe I was dumber and more likely to believe his lies when he disappeared for hours or I heard rumors from the other women.
He seems dead set on giving us both an STI, and I can only pray I walk out of here with one of the treatable ones.
At the very least, don’t let it be something that I can pass on to the baby.
The woman he’s fucking peeks back over her shoulder and smirks when she spots me. There was a time I would have given a shit. More than that, seeing this little display wouldhave ripped my heart out. I feel nothing outside of apathy and an unrealistic hope that she can win him over. It’s a shitty thought to have because I know what happens when Blade gets obsessed with someone, but I would have a much better chance at escaping if I was no longer his current fascination.
