“Jess,” I whisper her name urgently. There’s only a foot or so of space between us, and it takes every ounce of willpower in me to not reach for her, to not grab her hand and squeeze it out of comfort. “Did something happen with Rourke?” Though I don’t want to believe it, though a part of me trusts him even though he’s a stranger, it’s the only logical explanation for the switch in moods.
Everyone was happy when I left. Or at least, mostly happy. This feels like the total opposite.
“He’ll kick my ass from here to Sunday, but if he did something to make you feel uncomfortable, I’ll do my best to defend your honor—” Offering to get into a fight with an über for her. Now that’s crazy.
“He thinks we’re scent matches.”
I blink. “What?”
Jess props herself up and turns her head toward me, repeating what she said word for word, “He thinks we’re scent matches.” The way she says it, I can’t tell if she’s confused or angry or something else. There’s almost no emotion in her tone, which I find in and of itself startling. It’s like she’s shut down, turned herself numb.
Like she doesn’t want to face it if it is true.
Hearing she might be scent matches with another alpha makes me feel… uneasy, mostly because after the whole talk with Mason, I’ve come to the conclusion I like her. I like her more than I should. If she’s Rourke’s scent match, what hope do I have?
But, the more I think on it, the more her choice of words resonate with me.He thinks.A strange thing to say when scent matches are in the picture. The whole thing about scent matches is you’re supposed toknow.
“What do you think?” I ask her.
“I think… I think I—I don’t know.” She frowns. “I mean, I do feel something when he’s near me, but… I just thought that was because I’m unmatched. It’s not just attraction. It’s something I can’t really explain.”
I’ve read stories about people finding their scent matches. The overwhelming desire, the desperate need to have them; I get none of that from her right now, which totally confuses me. Rourke doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who’d pull somethinglike this out of his ass, so all in all, I can genuinely say I don’t get it. I don’t get what’s happening.
“But we can’t be scent matches,” she whispers, and when she says it again, her voice wavers, “we can’t be.” She blinks rapidly, and my spirits sink when I see the tears forming in the corners of her eyes. She really is upset over this possibility.
“Hey,” I say, reaching for her. I take her hand in mine and give it a squeeze. Her hand is ridiculously soft, and thankfully she doesn’t pull away from me. “It’s okay. It’s nothing to freak out about if it is true. It might make things a little harder when your heat comes, but—”
She shakes her head once. “It’s not that.”
“Then what is it?”
She purses her lips and shakes her head again, and she pulls her hand away from mine. Just like that, I can see her walls being erected. She doesn’t want to talk about it, not yet. Maybe she will later, once everything has time to settle.
The only thing I want to do is make her feel better, but with Jess shutting down, my hands are tied. I’m not even mad another alpha might be her scent match. My anger is due to the fact she’s taking it so hard.
Guess I need to talk to Rourke.
I get up and wander to the dock. To think, I wanted to use today to spend time with Jess, to talk to her… and to apologize for how I acted all those years ago. It’s something that needs addressed. I can’t let it go on like this. I need her to know how sorry I am for not being there for her when she needed me the most. If I could get a time machine and go back, I would change it all in a heartbeat.
When I reach Rourke, I gingerly sit down beside him and say, “So, Jess said you told her something pretty interesting while I was gone.”
He stares out at the calm surface of the lake. “Yeah, I did. I knew it was probably a bad idea, but I couldn’t keep it to myself.” He’s slow in turning his head to look at me. “I won’t let it affect the job, if that’s what you’re worried about.”
He doesn’t seem like the kind of alpha that would let his feelings interfere with a mission, and I recognize that. “I’m more worried about Jess and how she’s taking it. I don’t think normal omegas cry when they find their scent matches.”
Rourke grows alarmed. “She’s crying? Fuck.” He runs a hand along the side of his face. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the über so perturbed.
Jess wasn’t bawling her eyes out or anything; she just got misty eyed, but that’s enough for me. I say, “She seems pretty upset at the possibility. Are you sure you two are scent matches? I don’t think that’s normally how an omega reacts. Isn’t this something you guys should’ve known sooner?”
“I had a feeling the first moment I met her at the Omega Garden, but the way she acted threw me for a loop. Just like now. It’s almost like she knows it, deep down, but something’s missing on her end. I don’t know what.” He groans. “I feel like such an asshole. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
Everything he tells me, he sounds sincere. It makes it impossible to be upset with him. It’s like I want both Jess and Rourke to feel better, odd as it is.
“No, if it’s true,” I tell him, “you have every right to address it. I think, maybe, she’s just scared. Do you know her parents died ten years ago?”
“Yeah, it’s why her aunt is her guardian.”
“That’s just the tip of the iceberg. She was in the car when it happened. She barely survived. Had to have multiple surgeries, was even in a coma for a little while. Then, when she finally woke up, she had to do physical therapy and all that.”
