‘From this nightmare,’ I add quietly.
He lets out a relieved laugh and pulls me into his arms.
‘I knew you’d see it eventually,’ I tell him. ‘I knew you’d work it out.’
His eyes become sad. ‘It took me too long. My life has been a misery since I let you slip through my fingers, Erin. I was stupid to break things off all those years ago, paving the way for Gil to swoop in and have you, and in the last few weeks I’ve been watching you as the day got nearer and thinking what an idiot I was. I love you. I’ve always loved you.’
My heart is singing at his words. These are the things I always want him to say, but he hardly ever does. Not because he doesn’t feel them, but because they’re buried so deep. This is the Simon who swept me off my feet when we were first together. But my brain is sorting through the sounds and syllables and realizing something is off, something doesn’t add up.
‘But wait … What do you mean, you let me slip through your fingers? We’re together. We’ve always been together.’
Simon takes my hand and presses it to his chest before covering it with his own. ‘We are now … That’s all that matters.’ He leans towards me, his eyelids closing.
No. This is all wrong.
I put my hands up, intending to push against his chest, but I’m a little late. Simon’s lips meet mine for a fraction of a second before I back away, and it’s at this exact moment that the flap of the cloakroom door moves and I hear Anjali’s voice. ‘Erin! It’s time for the speeches. Seriously, do you think you and Gil can stop sneaking off together so I have to come and find—’
I’m aware this doesn’t look good: the bride and best man found in the cloakroom, just a bit too close for it to look totally platonic. Simon and I spring apart.
Anjali’s eyes are wide. ‘Simon?’
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Present Day
Anjali looks at me and then at Simon and then back at me again and her expression of surprise hardens into a frown. I lunge forward, reaching for her, but she backs away shaking her head, and then runs off out of the cloakroom. I shoot a look at Simon, whose mouth is a grim, straight line and take off after her. Simon tries to pull me back, but I’m too fast for him. I slide out of his grip before his fingers close around my lower arm. ‘I’ll be back in two secs,’ I say as I go through the flap to the main tent. ‘I promise.’
I catch up with Anjali as she’s about to head outside into the walled garden. She doesn’t even wait for me to say anything, but turns to face me as soon as I get near. ‘What was that all about?’
‘All what?’
She folds her arms. Anjali might be ditzy, but she’s very good at reading a vibe, and clearly she picked upsomethinggoing on between me and Simon that’s caused her antenna to twitch. ‘It looked very much as if you and Simon were about to kiss when I walked in.’
‘I … It wasn’t … It’s not like that!’ Technically, yes, our lips met,just for a split second, but I was trying to avoid it. ‘There’s nothing between Simon and me,’ I mumble, looking away. And I’m telling the truth. There isn’t. Not in this upside-down version of my life.
‘He’s your ex, Erin. And it’s your wedding day.’
The look she gives me threatens to strip the flesh from my bones.
‘I thought I knew you …’ she says, shaking her head, and then she exits the marquee and strides off into the dusk.
I have no idea what to say, so I let her go. I haven’t done anything wrong, but nobody here would ever understand. I head back into the cloakroom, where Simon is waiting for me.
‘We can’t be seen together,’ I tell him. ‘Just … just let me get through today and we’ll talk … We’ll sort this all out.’
‘Get through today? What do you mean?’
‘I mean, we should keep our heads down and I’ll call you tomorrow.’ And, hopefully, tomorrow won’t exist, because I’ll have woken up, awkward double groom situation completely averted.
Simon’s expression becomes thunderous. ‘You don’t mean … Erin! You can’t leave the reception and have a wedding night with him. Not now we know this whole day was a huge mistake!’
‘It’s not the right moment for us,’ I plead feebly. ‘Another time, another place …that’sour moment.’ I look him deep in the eyes, because this is the truth, even though he doesn’t know it. ‘Trust me?’
Simon’s jaw is tense, but he nods. ‘Okay, I trust you.’ He glances at the cloakroom door. ‘You go first. I’ll be out in a couple of minutes.’
I almost slide round the thick white flap of marquee fabric,not wanting to reveal anyone else is inside, and when I turn around I get the shock of my life: Gil is standing there.
‘Dessert has been served. We’re waiting to do the speeches.’
