Berkr growled louder like he thought that might somehow help.
When I made a move to get between them and comfort her as Berkr snarled down at her, she motioned for me to stay back.
Swiping the tears from her cheeks, she took a deep breath, squared her shoulders, and lifted her head. “I’m sorry beasts were hurt. I’m sorry I followed him through the portal. I’m sorry I was so horrible to Mina. I felt terrible about everything, even more so after the full extent of George’s deceit came out, about all of it. Mina getting kidnapped, beasts getting injured. I’m sorry I had any part of any of that, you have tobelieve me. I’m sorry I ever met that jerk. I’m sorry I went along with any part of his stupidity. I’m sorry I didn’t just let him kill me like he’d threatened to when I stopped going along with everything he said. I was selfish and stupid and scared and I’ll never forgive myself for all the damage done, all the pain I caused.”
“Candy-ass come to village, make Tarnk think Candy-ass be Tarnk mate.” Folding his thick arms over his chest, Berkr huffed and puffed, loud scoffing chuffs leaving him.
“I didn’t have a choice!” Dace softly wailed. Grabbing at Berkr’s arm, she eyed him pleadingly. “You don’t know what he was like, what it was like at the end, what he-” Cutting herself off, she took a deep breath. “George was crazy. If I didn’t do what he said, he started to hit me. The hitting turned into punching, kicking. In the end, it was all arguments and then beatings.” Her fingers shook as she clung to him. “Tarnk was nice to me. Too nice. I was scared and I just wanted away from George. That’s why I agreed to go into the village at all, why I let Tarnk take off with me. But then Tarnk was way too nice, too fast, and then he wanted to get really nice with me but I-”
“What?” Berkr snarled. “Candy-ass but what?”
“I didn’t like him like that,” she blurted. “I didn’t know him, trust him. I didn’t… I didn’t want him to see.”
“See what?” Berkr snapped.
“The bruises. What I’d let happen to me. My personal shame,” Dace blurted.
The wind in Berkr’s sails deflated.
Avoiding any and all eye contact, she mumbled, “I just wanted to go home.”
“Detret no want Candy-ass,” Berkr grunted out and jerked her hand off of his arm. “Has female. Candy-ass not think take Detret from him mate. Lo denaii only mate one.”
Scrubbing at her face like the weight of all of this was dragging her down, she closed her eyes and muttered tiredly, “As I’ve said before, I don’t want Detret.”
“Why Candy-ass come back then? Why not stay in Urff wor-eld, grow old, die, leave Berkr ‘lone?”
My eyebrows shot up at that one, because the only being bothering anyone here was Berkr constantly cornering Dace to nitpick her to death. Aside from attempting small talk during chores, or hanging out with Joanie and her crew, Dace appeared to keep to herself.
“After the hospital,” Dace murmured quietly, “my family had written me off, no one wanted to hire me, not anywhere I could make a living by myself. My uncle didn’t want me staying with him and my aunt, afraid I was too unstable.” Fiddling with her fingers, she admitted, “I finally got a job but it was a bad situation. I quit but ended up living in my car. Things got really bad. I- I had nowhere else to go.”
“What untable? Why unkrel think Candy-ass untable?” Berkr leaned in to sniff her, then let out a short sneeze.
“I might have panicked and ran to the police about George,” Dace blurted with a wince.
“What the ‘lice have to do with unkrel think Candy-ass untable?” Berkr’s eyes narrowed as she began to fidget.
“The police thought I was crazy and I ended up being admitted to a mental institution.” Clearing her throat, she said simply, “They thought my brain was broken to the point I needed help from, uh, healers. Special help in a special place they don’t let you leave from until they think you’re all better.”
A loud chuff left the large Lo denaii. “Urff healers kidnap. Say Lo denaii bad for kidnap females but urfed healers take and keep too.”
“What do you do with beings you think need help?” Dace asked. She looked like she already knew the answer. She was trying to make a point.
Berkr muttered something under his breath in growl-speak and let out a chuff that told me he wasn’t interested in answering her question.
“Instead of shunning them or killing them, humans have facilities and doctors to try and help people that they think need help,” Dace said softly.
“Think Candy-ass head broked, untable, put in place and no let leave,” Berkr muttered with an unimpressed scoff.
“Could you imagine if they’d believed me?” Dace gave Berkr a long, measuring look. Shaking her head, she met my gaze. “I was a bad person. I did bad things. I helped bad people. I was institutionalized for believing in giant fur people that move between worlds through a portal I stumbled across in the forest, purely by accident while looking for the dead body of my lover’s fiancée. I’m complicit. I admit that. I was back in the human realm for years and years. I had lots of time to think about what I did, and I’m so sorry I can’t even say. I know nothing I do will fix this. Mina will probably hate me forever, her friends too, and I accept that. But I’m never going to stop trying. I’m never going to give up. I’m never going to be the pitiful thing I was before. I’m never going to give up on thinking there’s someone out there for me.”
“Candy-ass no find mate in village,” Berkr grunted out hotly. “No one want bad female for mate.”
Eyes narrowing, lips pursing, Dace muttered, “Then maybe I’ll find another village and look for him there, like how Gopher’s sisters came here.”
Berkr’s lips parted as he stared down at Dace, dumbstruck by her words.
“More or less, there you have it, now you know it all,” Dace muttered. Her gaze met mine and she smiled sadly. “I was an awful, no good, horrible human being. Being my friend will just get you shunned along with me. Berkr’s right. You really don’t want to be friends with me. It wouldn’t be fair to you. It might have been a long time ago and I’m not that person anymore but it wasn’t that long ago for them, and even if it was, you never really forget how a person does you, you know? You never forget how they made you feel. They need to be angry with me and I understand that now. You need a chance to make a start here. You won’t have that with me getting in the way, putting a being off for being around me. I’m bad for you. You need to avoid me if you can.”
