‘Mad at me’
‘Please’
‘Soon I can’
Unable to understand what I was staring at, I quickly dialled his number. But it was switched off. It had been like that since then. I still tried it this morning and it didn’t go through.
“Look, I just want know what your deal with him is.” Kenzo’s voice cut into my train of thoughts. “I mean, like you talk to him all the time and go on numerous coffee dates like some old couples.”
He was right. Before the movie date and after I asked him to be my boyfriend, he had come down to Braemont to see me about four or five times. It was always the same. Coffee dates, a stroll in the park, and then stolen kisses. We had never done anything else, nothing reckless.
I could have pushed. I knew how to push for more. But Callan wasn’t like other boys or men that I had ever been involved with. He was…delicate, special. There was always something fragile in the way he touched me, like he was afraid one wrong move could break the entire moment. So I waited for him instead. I didn’t want to put pressure on him, make him panic, scare him off.
Even then, I wondered; would there ever be a moment he would pull me closer when I tried to pull away from the kiss? Would he ever choose more on his own?
“What is he to you, really?” he pressed.
“He’s my boyfriend, Kenzo,” I reminded him, then proceeded to unlock my phone. “And I believe when people who really like each other are in a relationship, they tend to talk to each other all the time.”
“That’s exactly my point,” he mumbled in distaste. “You have known him for just what? A few days and he’s already your boyfriend?”
“What’s your point, exactly?” I asked, staring at the messages I sent to Callan.
‘Are you okay? —09 : PM
‘I’m really worried’ — 03: 00 AM
‘Call me, Callan’ — 06: 00 AM
‘Don’t go ghost mode on me again, damn it! — 07: 00AM
‘That’s it. I’m dumping your fucking arse’ — 09: 00 AM.
The last message was sent an hour ago.
“I just need you to be careful,” Kenzo uttered, his tone a bit on edge. “I don’t want you to–”
“–Get hurt, I know, I know.” I cut him off. “I’m going to be alright. I got this.”
Then I typed,‘I haven’t dumped you yet. Just call me, please. I promise I’m not mad at you.’on the message bar, clicking send.
Kenzo watched my action, unimpressed even though I tried to be discreet. “You don’t know him, Beth.”
I met his gaze briefly before looking back at my screen. “I learn a lot about him every day. I know him now more than I did the first time we met…or at least, I think that.”
“Beth–”
“–Just drop it, Takahashi.” My tone sliced the air as I groaned, shoving a hand angrily into the nearly empty bowl of chicken.
I was here, going through a relationship crisis, and he was just on and on about me not knowing Callan. Seriously, that was the least of my problems right now.
Callan seemed to have abandoned me… again.
15
BETH
To use and discard.
