I would have loved to. Mrs. Takahashi’s birthday dinners were always a delight. She would promise a small gathering, but I would arrive and find the whole country already there.
In fact, I should be there. Rose Takahashi was nearly like a mother to me. She would buy me clothes sometimes—all designer brands, and often took me to a daughter and mom mani pedi. She fed me many times until my belly was full.
She deserved my presence.
But I couldn’t. Not today.
“I-I can’t,” I said finally, staring at my feet, hating the taste of the words rolling off my tongue.
Zaghan was picking me up. He said he wanted us to spend the day together, like I wasn’t already spending more time with him than with myself.
He was keeping an eye on me now, really keenly. He’d watch me the way people watched exits. Like I might vanish if he blinked. And the thought of disappointing him, of doing something that looked like distance, made my chest tight.
He wouldn’t let me go. He would hunt me down, destroy anything that looked like a challenge and this time, lock me in a proper cage.
His obsession with me wasn’t fallacy, not a performance memorised to keep me next to him. It was real, a disease that had burrowed deep into his bones. I understood it clearly then, watching Mr. Donald’s limbs come apart.
“Oh.” Kenzo hesitated, his disappointment obvious in his ocean eyes. “You sure?”
“Yeah.” I nodded, my tone wistful. Then my gaze suddenly lifted, spine straightening at the sound of screeching tyres.
The familiar black car turned into the parking lot, and even with the tinted glasses, I still saw the shadow watching me. My heart began to pound, pulse erratic, my hands suddenly clammy.
“I have to go.”
“Come on, Beth,” Kenzo insisted, his voice nearly persuasive. “I don’t want to be the only one there.” Panic detonated inside me as his skin suddenly burned into mine. My eyes flickered sharply to where his slender fingers wrapped around my wrist all of a sudden, halting me.
Zaghan had cut off a man’s arm for touching me. He said, swore that no other man was allowed to lay a hand on what belonged to him…me.
I yanked my hand from Kenzo’s grip like he burnt me. “Stop.” My voice came out sharp, cracked.
Kenzo stared at me, hurt flashing in his eyes. “What exactly is going on, Beth? Why are you acting strange?”
The passenger door of the black car suddenly swung open, and a soldier stepped out, cavorting a few steps before pulling the back door open…for me.
It was a silent call. One I couldn’t refuse.
“Beth,” Kenzo called after me, desperate, voice cracking, but my feet were already leading me far away.
“Beth!” he called again, but I didn’t answer. Didn’t look back. I didn’t want to hesitate, didn’t want to make it obvious that Kenzo wasn’t in support of this, of me leaving with Zaghan, or being with him in general.
“Beth!” The call was muffled, the echo muted the moment I slid into the car, the door shutting behind me, sealing me inside.
I didn’t dare look through the window, couldn’t see the broken look on my best friend’s face.
Kenzo used to be my human diary, one I told every little secret. But now he didn’t know me anymore, because I was becoming a different person, someone even I didn’t recognise these days.
Zaghan was sitting there, cloaked by darkness that followed him like a shadow, waiting, a look in his eyes I couldn’t quite tell.
“Hi,” I whispered. The word was an ache, heavy on my tongue.
His next action was automatic; his hand lifted, resting on my thigh. It settled there with such possessive ease as if it belonged to him by some cruel predestination.
I hated that I didn’t push it away, hated that deep down, I wanted it to be there. Because if I didn’t hate it, then it meant the rebellion I feigned was just an illusion to convince myself I wasn’t broken, that I wasn’t craving something dark and morally corrupt.
“I’m not going to do anything to him, you know,” he murmured, rubbing my inner thigh slowly with his thumb. “I mean, he is basically going to be my brother-in-law.”
My body went rigid. The mere thought of a future tied to him, this version was unbearable, suffocating. I wasn’t sure anymore if Callan was ever coming back. My hope thinned every time this face showed up in front of me and it wasn’t him instead. If he was really gone, I didn’t want to be here. I didn’t want a future with this monster.
