“I better get some shut-eye. Four a.m. is gonna come early as hell in the morning.”
“All right.”
“Sweet dreams. Love you, baby.”
“Love you, too.”
I close the screen and turn out the light, crawling beneath the covers. With a smile on my face, I snuggle the pillow he slept on last night to my chest, inhaling his familiar scent. Then I fall into a deep, deep sleep with the sweetest of dreams.
Present
“What time did she say she’d be here?” Rachel asks, sipping her glass of sweet tea.
“Around six.”
“It’s ten to. Think she’ll show?”
Peeking around the corner, I make sure Caroline is not within listening distance before I answer. She’s sitting on the couch watchingGoonies. One of Linc’s favorite movies. I smile to myself. She told me earlier she already missed him.
To which I replied with a rapid ‘me too.’
“I had a talk with her earlier about Dani coming by. She was curious why she hadn’t seen her since her father died, and I tried my best to explain to her that people just grieve in different ways. Hell, I’m just now starting to come to terms with it.”
Rachel’s hand covers mine. “I’m so proud of you. I knew it would take some time but I also know how strong you are.”
“I’m not that strong. If it hadn’t been for Linc, I would probably still be a mess.”
“You should give yourself some credit, Sylvie. After all you’ve been through, most people would have given up, found a way to numb the pain or bury it forever. But instead, you carry it. You get up every day and find a way to go on. To live. To take care of your daughter. To me that takes a lot of courage and strength.”
“I guess I never thought of it that way. Finding a way to get through each day without falling apart had become a challenge for me, one I faced with fear and hope in my heart, praying that someday I would wake up and it wouldn’t hurt so much anymore. I’m just so grateful those days have finally found me.”
“You deserve to be happy, Sylvie.”
A lump forms in the back of my throat. “Thank you for always being here for me, Rachel. I know I haven’t always been able to do the same for you, but I hope you know how important your friendship means to me.”
She leans forward, pulling me in for a hug. “I’ll always be here for you. No matter what.”
A few moments later, after we’ve wiped away our tears, the doorbell rings.
When I open the door, Dani bursts through in a flurry of movements and frantic words. “I’m so sorry I’m late. I got hung up at work. Stupid boss. I told him I had somewhere to be but he just wouldn’t listen. Where is she? I can’t wait to see…” A gasp falls from her mouth as she rushes inside.
Caroline is standing next to the couch. Dani drops her bag and falls to her knees in front of her. “Oh my God, you’ve grown so much.”
Dani doesn’t say a word as Caroline’s eyes flicker to mine with uncertainty. “Dani, why don’t you have a seat so you and Caroline can visit. Can I get you something to drink?”
Shaking her head, she begins to cry. “I can see him in your eyes,” she says, gathering Caroline into her arms. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”
Rachel is standing in the entry of the kitchen, concern etched all over her face. When Dani finally releases Caroline, she stands up and takes a seat on the couch, wiping the corners of her eyes.
I hand her a Kleenex. “Thank you,” she whispers.
“Why are you sad, Aunt Dani?” Caroline asks, taking a seat next to her.
“Because I miss your daddy so much.”
“I miss him too, but I don’t cry when I think about him anymore.”
“Oh yeah? Care to share your secret with me?” A small smile curls Dani’s lips.
