So yesterday I started digging around the house, looking for something.
Anything.
I didn’t want to walk into this without some kind of proof. I can point out the other things, like his diminishing appearance and erratic behavior but I wanted,needed,something more concrete.
I came up empty-handed at first, checking the usual places…drawers, closets, but only after I wandered out to his shop did I hit pay dirt.
Dean spends a lot of time out here working on his side jobs. I never bothered to come out here. I’ve always respected Dean’s space. But, apparently, he’s been doing more than just working. And he’s been doing this right under my nose. I didn’t have a damn clue.
How could I be so blind?
“I have this under control.”
“How? How do you have it under control? Look at yourself. You can’t even stand still.”
“Look, until you start bringing in some money around here, I don’t want to hear shit about what I do.”
That got me to my feet. “I have never asked you for more than I deserve. I take care of our home and our daughter so don’t you dare throw money in my face because that is not what this is about. You have a problem. You need help. So you either do something about it or you won’t have to worry about bringing home money for me becausewewon’t be here.”
It only takes him two strides before we are standing face-to-face. His eyes are wide, wild, and a haunting shade of brown. I know he has demons he’s never shared with me. Things that plague him. The only family he has a relationship with now is his sister, Dani, and I am convinced it is just as toxic as the shit he’s pumping into his veins.
He’s trying to make sense of my newfound confidence and it only takes a minute before he realizes I am not backing down.
Not from this.
He has one hell of a fight on his hands.
His jaw ticks mercilessly. “Don’t you threaten me, Sylvie. We both know you’re not going anywhere.”
Lifting my chin, I dig deeper than I ever have before. I love him. I want to help him but he has to help himself, too. “I’ll take her, Dean. I don’t want to keep your daughter from you but if you don’t get help we’re out of here,” I tell him with resolve.
Anger sweeps through my blood, adrenaline pounding in my ears as I shove past him and grab the keys sitting on the bar, but I don’t even make it to the door before he is in front of me again.
“You’re not fuckin’ leaving,” he grits, terror ripping down my spine.
“Yes, I am.”
His hand curls around my upper arm. “Where the fuck are you going to go? You going to run to him?”
“Dean, you’re hurting me.”
His eyes grow more wild, desperation heavy in their depths. His fingers tighten, and I know there will be a bruise there tomorrow.
“Dean, I can’t talk to you when you’re like this.” I try to wiggle from his hold and avoid his knowing stare.
“Tell me, Sylvie. Tell me you love me. I need to hear it.” The plea in his voice slams in my gut, a direct contradiction to the maddening look in his eyes.
“I—I can’t live like this anymore.”
He jerks my body hard against his. His fingers digging in deeper as he grits his teeth. “I can’t live without you. Do you understand? I won’t.”
It feels like I’ve just been hit in the stomach with a baseball bat. “Dean.”
“I’ll kill myself before I let you go.”
“Please don’t say things like that.”
“I mean it. You leave me you might as well dig a goddamn hole before you walk away and put me in it. I’m nothing without you.”
