He swipes at his eyes and lifts his head, pain radiating from every pinched groove and downturned line on his face.
“It’s always been my fault, Hayes. When your mom died, a part of me died with her. The only thing she left behind were those eyes, and I couldn’t bear to look at you. I wasn’t cut out to be a single parent.”
I see them now… all the ways he’s been scared.
I shrug. “I think I turned out okay.”
“I don’t know how to make it better between us,” he says.
I’ve been in this place for a long time. The one where he’s at the wheel but I’m giving the directions. I think it just comes naturally to me now to be the one with the plan.
“We take it one day at a time,” I tell him. “We start over.”
I don’t need a caregiver or financial support anymore. What I need is a family.
“We all make mistakes,” I continue. “I just want us to be there for one another through them.”
“I don’t deserve you,” he says, squeezing my hand back.
I wrap my arms around his neck, and he circles my middle. The small, broken girl inside of me screams for joy.
“You deserve all the best things this life has to offer, Dad.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
REED
“Dude, is that what I think it is?”
McCafferty picks up his chainsaw and plows into my shoulder to get by me. We’re dealing with a potential structure threat at a ranch property today, and he isn’t wasting any time following dispatch’s orders in protecting it.
“No,” he grunts, yanking on the ignition string even though we’re a good sixty yards away from the open hay field and stretch of pines we’re making a fire break between.
This is too good to let go of, so I keep up with his pace.
“Really?” I yell over the motor. “Because it looks to me like a tampon string is hanging from your nostril.”
He whips around and the limp fabric strand slaps him in the cheek.
I grin even wider.
“I get bloody noses in the summer. Sue me!”
“And you couldn’t have stuffed a wad of toilet paper up there? Did your girlfriend pack your line bag for you?”
He smirks and revs the four-stroke engine. “Nope.Yoursdid.”
Touché. I deserved that.
Now that the entire crew knows Hailey and I shared the same sleeping bag, it won’t be the last girlfriend comment thrown my way. It can’t vex me when I like the sound of it a little too much.
I watch her now, standing with Jack, and heave a sigh. We steal kisses whenever given the chance, but I’m not any closer to knowing what she’s thinking. The most private conversation we’ve had was one about her dad a week and a half ago. If I can’t have her to myself, I’m glad she has him to keep her company.
Or did, I think, as she sweeps her hand down his arm in aBe right backgesture.
Where is she going?
She jogs several feet, sizing up trees on the outskirts of the property until she ducks behind one. It’s out of view from everyone except Dean and me. He’s turned away from her, so I guess it’s only me who can see.
