“Dean!” she squeaks.
But a playful smile bends McCafferty’s lips, and he slaps me on the upper back. “I was kidding. All right, Morgan. Let’s hear what you got.”
Looking back on my dating history, it’s fairly platonic. What you’d expect from a typical high school and one year of college experience. I don’t talk about this part of my life, so I’ll keep it vague. With everyone’s eyes on me, this is the only thing I can think of to say.
“I spent an entire summer trying to get a girl to fall in love with me.”
“You’re joking,” McCafferty says first.
Everyone’s eyes narrow when they realize I’m serious.
“I wish I was.”
He asks the second question too. “And how did that work out for you?”
“Well, I’m here, aren’t I?” I shrug at him.
“But did you take off your shirt for her because…damn,” Ramirez says, smirking.
“Keep it in your pants.” Murphy grunts at him.
“What! You can’t tell me the guy doesn’t look good with an eight-rung ladder for abs.”
“And that will be the end of our game,” Hart interrupts.
A few more jokes get thrown around before everyone crawls in their own bivies. Even after my ant debacle, I still don’t understand how they can stand sleeping in a mummy bag with a net over their faces. But I got luckier than the rest this time; mine happens to have enough room for two.
In the dark, my sense of sound heightens tenfold. Everything feels closer: the crack of limbs buckling, the steady whistle of insects, and the whoosh of the wind circling us. I should be passing out. Rendered unconscious after what I put my body through today. But it’s my mind I can’t turn off.
There aren’t pieces of Teddy and Miles everywhere here like there would have been had I stayed in Bear Lake. But sometimes, like when I make the stupid decision to bring them up, they squat in my mind rent free.
“Reed?” I hear Hailey whisper into the dark. I helped construct her own bivy close enough to mine that they’re practically touching. I assumed she was asleep, but who am I to say when I can’t make out her outline.
“Yeah,” I respond, staring up into the night sky. Not even the brightest stars stand a chance against the smoke that drapes in the air.
“You want to tell me about her?” she asks.
I dip my head to the side she’s lying on as if we’re in the same bed together and I can see her face.
We still haven’t talked about Teddy. We haven’t defined what we are to each other, and I’m afraid she’ll see herself as the rebound girl if I’m really honest with how I once felt about Teddy. So, I make the choice to pretend like she meant less to me than she did.
“About who?”
“Your summer girl.”
“There’s not much to tell. I spent six summers with her, and she fell in love with my best friend.”
“Did she know how you felt?” she asks.
My cheek rubs against my sleeping bag with my nod. “Yeah. She knew.”
“How?” She sounds flabbergasted.
I sigh, realizing I can’t downplay the truth anymore. “She got in an accident last summer and lost her memory. All the moments we shared together, they were gone just like that. I guess some stupid part of me hoped I could help her get them back. So I spent the summer recreating those moments. But it only led her to remembering him.”
She slips silently from her sleeping bag. I only know she’s done it when I hear the zip of my own. It’s barely wide enough for my body, but I draw back to the edge, and she tucks her hips in so she’s flush against my skin. I help her close the net, distracted by the heat of her breath warming my lips.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers.
