One goodbye down, one more to go.
Through the cabin window, I see my parents sprawled out on the living room floor in front of the fire, playing a round ofUno. My mom bounces on her knees with glee as she places a wild draw-four on top of the pile. My dad groans, adding at least twenty cards to his hand. No matter how much of it is a game of chance, the odds have always been stacked in her favor.
The sight of the two of them doing something I’ve seen them do my entire childhood brings a fresh round of tears welling in my eyes. I push open the door after a long day and put a smile on, even though I’m not feeling very happy on the inside. I thought I was done doing that, pretending with them, but one more time won’t hurt.
In his haste to avoid the game, my dad whips around first. “Hey, Teddy Bear! How’d your day go?”
I roll back my shoulders. “It was a big one. I just quit my job.”
They both drop their hand of cards.
“Oh. Wow. That must mean…”
I nod. “Yep. It’s time.”
They fight half-hearted smiles.
“I promise I’ll call every day and I’ll buy healthy food and I’ll remember to exercise each morning and I’ll be safe. I’ll be back before you know it. I won’t stay away forever,” I say. It sounds like I’m trying to convince myself more than them, but they start nodding in the most understanding way, and I rush toward them.
They wrap me in their arms.
“We love you so much, Theadora. You can come back anytime you want. We’ll always be here for you,” my mom says.
There’s no brush tunneling through my hair this time, but she’s running her hands up and down my back, and it’s just as soothing as it was that night before I left home for my first day of kindergarten.
“And you can take myI Artedshirt with you to remember me by,” my dad blubbers into my hair.
I start to giggle, and my mom swats his arm. “Arch, she doesn’t want that disgusting shirt.”
“Then she can take one of your hats. One of us should part with a prized possession for our one and only daughter.”
My mom pulls away from our hug and rolls her eyes at him.
I squeeze them even tighter. “I’m going to miss you guys so much.”
“Oh, baby, we’re going to miss you too,” she says. Then she pulls back with a start again. “But what about Miles?”
My shoulders sink, and I want to tell themMiles didn’t choose me. We just weren’t meant to be. But I can’t say it out loud and make it true, so I say, “Miles decided he needs to be here for his dad.”
My mom tilts her head to the side, analyzing the feelings swirling across my features like a kaleidoscope. I know she won’t tell meI told you so, even if I deserve it.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart.”
I start to cry. “Why didn’t you guys just tell me about him?”And Reed and Cozy and what happened that night of the accident, I think too.
“Because Dr. Spalding…” my mom starts to say but stops herself.
She looks at my dad and grabs on to his hand for support.
“Because we were scared. Miles got a misdemeanor for what he did, and while he served his time, it didn’t change the fact that he almost took you from us. But we should have told you,” she says.
“So, tell menow. Everything that happened after the accident, and please don’t leave anything out.”
They both nod and start from the beginning. I learn that Miles left Bear Lake and moved to Montpelier to stay with his grandfather—a decision he made of his own accord. He waited for his court hearing where he plead guilty to reckless drivingand was sentenced to ninety days in the Bear Lake County Jail in Paris. When he was released, he worked to pay off his five hundred–dollar fine at a Maverick a half-mile from home where he could walk to his job. His license was suspended for six months.
Even in my parents’ version of events, Miles really didn’t plan to come back to Bear Lake until he found out his dad would be left to work the store alone for the summer. It’s why, even they, were surprised to see him.
“I hope you’ll understand that it’s hard enough letting go of your only child after they’re all grown up, but even more difficult trusting the person they give their heart to next. We were scared of losing you.”
