He nodded. “I know. I wish I could have told you that stuff before you saw it.”
I dared to grab his hand. He let me touch him but didn’t respond much to my fingers wrapping around his. I used my free hand to brush back the hair on his forehead. “You don’t have to say anything you don’t want.”
“I kind of do now,” he said with a sigh. “They’re taking the story and running with it. They don’t even know…They’re making up stuff. I can’t keep up, and I’m trying to help David with… shit.”
“What does David have to do with what happened to you and Bill?” I frowned.
Dakota scanned the now empty room. He pushed off the bench and went over to the door to shut it for good measure. He turned back to me and said, “He went to see them. Axe and Bill. We both were supposed to. It was a closure thing, you know?”
I nodded and crossed my arms over my chest as I listened. Dakota leaned his head back, staring at the ceiling for a moment to gather his thoughts.
“I should have stayed out of it.” He looked back at me now. “Because talking to them didn’t feel like it’d make things okay. Hearing that they found new jobs made it worse. I wanted to let things go. David didn’t, so he went in the summer.”
“Okay.” I nodded. “There’s nothing wrong with talking, right? I wouldn’t recommend having sit-downs with abusers, but maybe that’s his approach.”
“That wasn’t the problem. Me covering for him was. Because he disappeared again last week. And now, Axe is dead.”
“And you’re saying he…”
“No.” Dakota shook his head. “He didn’t kill the guy. He’s not that type of unhinged. But he was one of the last people to talk to him. And maybe that set Axe off. I can’t get David to tell me what he said. Now I have reporters blowing up my phone for a fucking quote, and I don’t want to talk about it. I can’t talk yet. I need fucking quiet. Everyone wants me to talk about something that doesn’t affect them in the slightest, but it hurt me.”
He pressed his fingers against his closed eyes in frustration. My heart felt like it was in my throat. I moved over to wrap my arms around his torso. He didn’t respond at first. Dakota felt stiff and cold as I held him. I pressed my cheek against his chest, hoping my warm grip would remind him that he didn’t have to do this alone. That he’d never have to do any of this alone. He didn’t have to be the guy helping everyone. Going out of his way to make others feel safe. I’d do that for him now and always. Whatever it took, I’d make him feel safe.
“You’re not talking to anyone you don’t want to, Dakota,” I promised. “Ever. Let them make up stories and come up with theories. Your story is yours alone. You deserve to keep it to yourself. No one has the right to know. Absolutely no one.”
His arms wrapped around me then. Dakota held me close, rubbing his hands up and down my back. I glanced up to see the hard look on his face had faded away. He peered down at me, smiling a little with gratefulness.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “About the fight with Tyler. He’s just…”
“A dick.”
He chuckled and the sound made me fill up with the hope that everything would be okay. That he’d be okay eventually. Maybe he’d talk one day. And maybe he wouldn’t. But whatever happened, I would be there to support the decision either way.
“He didn’t even say much. Typical lineup jeering but between the news and what he did to you. I couldn’t hold back.”
“It’s horrible to say, but I’m glad you didn’t. If anyone deserves to learn a lesson, it’s him.”
Dakota brushed his fingers across my cheek. “I don’t how well I taught the lesson but he’s in a little worse shape than I am.”
I pulled back, now worried about his injuries. “Should I get Kyle to look at you?”
He shook his head and pulled me close again. “No. I’m fine.”
“You flinched when I first hugged you,” I noted and made sure my arms around his middle weren’t too tight. “You should get it checked out.”
“Later,” he promised. “I need it to be you and me right now.”
I pressed a kiss on his neck, more than willing to fulfill his request.
“I’m sorry about not calling you back,” Dakota continued. “The walls felt like they were closing in. I couldn’t get a handle on it, and I knew if I spoke to you, you’d ask if what they were saying was true.”
“My only concern was if you were okay, Dakota. I don’t care about everything else. You don’t have to push me away. Push everyone else, but don’t push me.”
He leaned his cheek on the top of my head. “Thank you. Because everyone else is a lot. I don’t want to hear the opinions. People will support you at first. But then, they’ll turn. Say shit like why didn’t you say something? You’re a guy.”
My throat tightened at the anger in his tone. Dakota seemed to be getting heated all over again. I didn’t blame him. Because he was right. When people learned that a guy could be sexually assaulted too, a lot tended to not want to accept the possibility. People forgot that they weren’t completely untouchable. Dakota, like every other human on this planet, could be hurt. Could be wronged and silenced and scarred. He could feel fear and not want to share that fear. He deserved to keep it to himself for as long as he wanted.
“And I was a little embarrassed to admit it to you,” he confessed in a whisper.
