“Why does anyone drown, Leo?”
He pushed himself into a sitting position and stared down at me. “I’m being serious.”
When I didn’t answer, he added, “You do realize I just performed CPR?”
I closed my eyes for a moment so they wouldn’t widen as I vaguely recalled his mouth on mine.
“You’re lucky I finished my class,” he grumbled. “If this had happened last week, you might have been a goner.”
I let out a dry laugh. “Don’t be so dramatic.”
“You were drowning,” he reminded me. “Were you…”
Leo’s pause made me focus my gaze on him. He was close enough that I could smell his trademark mix of aloe and chlorine. His soaked gray t-shirt clung to him. At sixteen years old, Leo’s body was a swimming machine. His broad shoulders and hard muscles gave him enough speed to capture the attention of Division I universities across the nation.
I tried to keep my eyes above his neck as I studied him, but it was difficult. This was the closest I’d ever gotten to Leo. And I had to nearly drown to do it.
“Was I what?” I probed, pushing myself up into a sitting position as well.
Leo searched my face, looking for an answer to a question he hadn’t even asked. I frowned again.
“Were you trying to be a goner?” he asked, voice quiet and almost scared. He was still close enough for me to smell and now, feel. Heat radiated off his body despite the cool water still dripping from his hair. I had to resist the urge to lean into him because I was darn near frozen in my black one-piece.
“What do you mean?” My mind raced, trying to come up with a reason for me to be out here so late. I couldn’t tell him the truth. Not without risking him sharing it with my brother, Nate.
“I mean…” Leo cleared his throat like the words got caught halfway in between. “You can tell me. I would never judge you.”
My nose wrinkled, not convinced. “Really?”
“Never.” He nodded. “Why are you really out here, Kira?”
I wiped away a trail of water running down the bridge of my nose. “I’d rather not say.”
“I can’t help you if you don’t.”
“Who says I need your help? If I needed help, the last person I’d go to is someone who ignores me,” I said in a far more clipped tone than I meant.
He didn’t look offended, though. Guilt washed over me as we both sat in silence for a while. I should have been thanking him for saving me, not trying to bite his head off—and definitely not sharing one of my biggest insecurities with him.
I couldn’t bring myself to apologize though. My throat tightened every time I opened my mouth.
“I understand,” he finally said in a perfectly even tone that put me to shame. “And I’ll leave you alone again after this.” My shoulders sagged at the comment, but he wasn’t finished. “Just, please—I can’t let this go until you tell me whether you were trying to drown on purpose.”
My eyes widened. “On purpose? You think I was drowning on purpose?”
He shifted, clearly uncomfortable with my shock. “Sorry. I know I jumped to a conclusion. When I saw you in the water, it was hard not to.”
“I wasn’t trying to end my life, Leo,” I insisted in a quieter tone. His anger and concern made sense now.
“I understand how hard…I knew someone who…” He stammered, rethinking his response. “Nevermind. I’m just sorry.”
I nodded and chewed on my bottom lip for a moment. His fingers clenched and unclenched as he studied the water in the pool.
I said the only thing I could think of to move the conversation in a different direction. “I was trying to push myself.”
He looked back at me, brown eyes curious, but his mouth remained closed as he waited for me to continue.
“I’m trying to learn how to swim,” I said, forcing the words out. “The tough love way.”
