Before they poison everything we’re trying to build.
Chapter 49
Raven
We havetwo weeks left of the school year, and I’m at a loss. The weight of everything pressing down on me feels suffocating. I know what needs to be done. I also know what I want to do. Neither path is going to be easy. I stare out over the woods below the oasis; the trees stretching endlessly like a dark green sea. My hand rises to my chest, and I feel that flicker of a tether—warm, golden, then gone again like a candle flame in the wind.
I’ve been having waking dreams lately. Vivid visions that blur the line between sleep and consciousness. I dream of fire, a lake of fire where the waters flicker with living flames. The heat feels real against my skin even after I wake, leaving me drenched in sweat and gasping. In my heart, I feel it’s related to my mysterious mate—the fifth bond that pulses and fades. My eyes remain shifted as I watch the horizon, vertical slits tracking every movement. I’m not sure what I’m looking for, but it’s out there.Waiting.And I’m terrified of what finding it will mean. What I’ll become when all five bonds are complete.
The silhouette of my father’s dragon breaks the horizon, and something settles in me. The familiar shape against the sky makes my chestloosen slightly. My entire world has been turned upside down. I believed I had one birth father, and yet I have three. It explains a lot of what I can do and why—the stone gaze, the acid, the commanding presence that makes ancient beings bow. But it doesn’t explain the voice in my head that isn’t mine. The dragon that’s becoming separate from me, growing stronger while I feel like I’m losing pieces of myself.
Several wing beats later, Dad lands on the sand beside me. His drake is gigantic, and I am catching up at an alarming rate. Each time I shift, I’m bigger. Each time, my dragon is harder to pull back. He shifts back; the transformation rippling across his body and opens his arms to me and smiles. “How is my progeny?” Thauglor says as he closes the distance between us, his boots silent on the sand.
I dive into my father’s arms and rest my head on his chest, sliding my wings over his shoulders like a blanket. He wraps me in his wings, and we just stand there holding each other. The warmth of him surrounds me, familiar and safe. For a moment, I’m just his daughter again. Not the heir apparent. Not the chimera. Not the thing becoming more beast than woman.
“There’s been a lot of changes, little one. Are you okay?” Dad rumbles to me, and I sigh.
“Not really, Dad.” I squeeze him harder, my fingers digging into his back, holding on like he’s the only thing keeping me tethered to who I was.
“What’s wrong, my most precious one?” The deep rumbling purr that is felt more than heard echoes in my chest. His subsonic purr was something I felt even in my egg before I hatched—a sound that means safety, home, love.
Everything, I’m afraid I’m losing.
“The chimera thing, fighting Mom, dreams of a lake made of living flames.” I spit everything out and relax, feeling like I lifted a boulderoff my chest. The words hang between us in the warm afternoon air. But I don’t tell him the rest. I don’t tell him about the voice. About how my dragon speaks to me now as a separate entity. About how sometimes I look in the mirror and don’t recognize the predator staring back.
“The chimera thing was quite unexpected.” Dad says and sighs, his chest rising and falling beneath my cheek. “I have to admit I was quite disappointed that I wasn’t your only father. But I gained a son and another daughter as well, so there’s that.” He kisses the crown of my head, his lips warm. “It’s a lot to adjust to.” He opens his wings, and I slowly open mine, the leather membranes catching the breeze. “You are still blood of my blood. You look like me, so that means you took the most after me.” He looks out over the oasis, deep in thought.
But am I still me? Or am I becoming something else entirely?
“What about the fighting mom thing?” I arch an eyebrow, watching my father as I flex my wings nervously. The movement is instinctive when I’m anxious.
“Most times...” Dad pauses, trying to parse how he’s going to explain it. “Usually the females are in different flights. Not usually mother and daughter.” I arch my brow at that, surprised.
“So what happens when they are in the same flight?” I pause, looking at my dad. His face falls, and he draws in a deep breath that I feel expand his chest.
“I’m not sure how it would work now.” His eyes lower, and I watch them close. “As a mate, I want to and need to protect my female.” He draws in a deep, slow breath. “As a father, I want to protect you from everything. So Klauth, Balor, and I will be in hell every time you two clash.” The pain in his voice makes my chest ache.
“How many times do you think we’ll clash?” I look up at my dad like I used to when he was the most powerful drake in the world to me.Like he was a superhero who could fix anything. Before I learned some things can’t be fixed. Some things just are.
Dad puffs up his chest and sighs. “Hopefully not too much. Dragon to dragon, other than breath weapon, I think you may be able to take your mom. Her breath weapon?” He looks away and lowers his head, shaking it. “It’ll kill you.” He turns and looks at me seriously, his sapphire eyes intense.
“That’s my fear too. Physically, even human, I think I can take her.” The words taste like ash in my mouth. What kind of daughter am I that I can say this so easily? “Dragon-wise, I’m not sure whose bigger at this point.” I wrap my wings closer to my body, trying to make myself smaller. Trying to be less of the monster I’m becoming.
“I’ll talk to your mom and see what we can figure out.” Dad says before he pulls me into his arms and kisses my temple. “I love you, my most precious one.”
Purring softly, I hug Dad closer, trying to absorb his strength and confidence. “I don’t want to hurt her. Last time we fought, all I saw was red and a target, not my mom.” I admit my biggest fears, my voice breaking. She was a target, a threat, not my mom. The thought terrifies me more than anything else. “What if I can’t stop myself next time? What if the dragon takes over completely and I...” I can’t finish the sentence. I can’t say the words that haunt my nightmares.
“You saw her as a target?” Dad steps back and looks at me with fear flickering in his eyes—fear of me, fear for me. His eyes go distant—that look he gets when he’s communicating with someone through their bond—then he flick back to the present. “Klauth is on his way.”
I arch a brow, looking at him. “What’s wrong?” But I already know. They see it too. They see what I’m becoming.
Klauth arrives with Ziggy moments later, the air shimmering as they materialize. Then Ziggy leaves just as quickly, phasing away. “Can you allow your father to show me what you saw during the fight?” Klauthasks, his crimson-flecked amber eyes serious and searching. I nod slowly and look over at my father, granting him permission. Maybe if they see it, they can help me. Maybe they’ll know how to stop this.
Or maybe they’ll confirm my worst fear—that I’m becoming something that can’t be stopped. The minute Dad’s hands touch my face, warm and familiar, I think back to the fight. The memory rises unbidden, and with it comes the terror all over again.
“Ladies, you know the rules. No maiming, no killing, no cutting off of limbs or blinding. No acid, no lightning, and no use of familiars in the battle.” Callan’s voice carries across the silent courtyard.
We walk to the center of the ring and bump fists. Her knuckles are hard against mine, scales meeting scales. “Don’t hold back, Raven. I am not your mother in this ring. I am a threat to your nest and hatchlings. I am a threat to your mates’ safety.” Mom says, and I feel the rage boiling under my skin like acid waiting to be released. My vision tints red at the edges, the world narrowing to just her.
