Sage isn’t fooled by him, though, I can tell, and worse, she’s not buying the bullshit act I’m selling either. Glancing quickly at me, her lips twitch. She holds out a hand to him, then turns on her own brand of country girl sweetness. “Thank you. I’m glad we finally get to meet the man who’s swept Noah off her feet.” Curious blue eyes linger on the ruthless monster I’m about to tie myself to. With a reassuring nod she smiles at me. “This restaurant is”—her gaze moves around the elegant decor—“wow. Impressive to say the least.”
“Yes. Thanks for inviting us. We’re glad to spend some time with you before the big day.” Kade gives me a crooked grin I can’t quite read, and I have to wonder if he’s thinking about his brother. My lungs deflate on a stuttered exhale. My heart clenches so tightly that I feel abruise coming on. I prefer thoughts of Rhett that leave a mark on me internally than live with the external wounds Bradley has inflicted.
Eyeing my husband-to-be, I hope he hasn’t noticed the conflicted feelings rising inside me, set to overflow like a river in a storm. Kade and Sage take the ornate chairs on the opposite side of the plush booth. “It’s pretty fancy, I know.”
Once we’re all settled, Kade’s brows raise as he looks over the menu, and I don’t miss the way Sage gently nudges him. I know what he’s thinking—what they’re both thinking. This place is pretentious and expensive and way too over the top for Noah Lane. They’re not wrong, but it’s not because I can’t afford it now or don’t deserve it. This is simplynotme. It’s too bad my friends are aware, but the man I’m marrying doesn’t have a damn clue. Or maybe he does, and he’s simply more concerned that we’re pulling off the guise of a happy, loving couple.
As the waiter joins us, I press my lips together to contain the part of me that simply wants to explode because I know what’s coming. Without asking anyone’s preferences, Bradley orders an appetizer for the table. That wouldn’t be so bad, except, he continues right on. “My gorgeous fiancée will have a glass of champagne and eggs Benedict.” It’s all I can do not to make a face.
Sage’s brow raises, but she doesn’t comment, eventhough she’d know after a ten-second perusal of the menu that I’d prefer the Belgian waffles topped with strawberries and fresh whipped cream.
From there, the strained conversation is almost unbearable. Every time Kade or Sage bring up anything about Black River—or worse, how nice it’d been to have me home—Bradley grabs my wrist under the table. It’s simply another not-so-subtle reminder that I won’t be back anytime soon and there’s not a damn thing to be done about it.
Somehow I survive his brand of stealthy abuse throughout the meal. Sage and Kade have been observing our interactions almost too carefully, and it’s making me want to bury my face in my hands in mortification. From the way Sage’s eyes are blazing with a slow fire, I know this isn’t going well.
Bradley doesn’t care one bit, if he even notices. All he wants is what me on his arm as his wife will do for his image.
As this high-class torture comes to an end, I exhale, offering Sage and Kade a misty smile before hugging them. Bradley hooks my elbow with his hand, gripping me so tightly, I wince.
“So. Rehearsal dinner at the hotel tomorrow night?” Sage finishes by clamping her bottom lip between her teeth as she looks into my eyes. “Then the big day is Saturday. Are you two ready?”
Kade brings a hand up, resting it on her shoulder. “I’m sure they’ll be sprinting to the altar by the time Saturday rolls around.” He cocks his head, and I can’t help but think his eyes search out everything I’m trying to hide.
Nodding, I push down the swarm of bees buzzing in my stomach and plaster a smile on my face as I turn to gaze adoringly at Bradley. He takes my hand in his and brings it to his lips, brushing a kiss over the back. “Can’t wait to make it official.”
“I bet,” Kade chuckles. “Noah deserves only the best.” A muscle at the back of his jaw jumps, and my heart sinks like lead.
I had the best once upon a time, and I gave him away.
For that, I will never, ever forgive myself.
The pressure builds inside my chest until I’m afraid my heart might burst through my rib cage. There’s no denying that my friends can see through this ruse. But here’s hoping Kade and Sage never figure outexactlywhat is off between Bradley and me. I’d rather die.
Funny, because marrying Bradley might just kill me.
NOAH
18
Soul-deep regret launchesinto me with the force of a cannonball as my eyes lower. I can’t bear to look in the mirror at my reflection, but I feel beautiful. The tears that’d fallen upon receipt of the package Grandma Jo had sent resurface. She bought methedress. Disbelief quickens my pulse. It’s everything the old me ever dreamed of, but why torture myself? It’s not like I can wear it to marry Bradley, nor do I want to. This belongs to a past left behind. Trying it on, there’s only one man I can envision walking down the aisle toward. And it’s not my future husband.
I’m supposed to be meeting Sage and my mother at the hotel any minute now. The bridal party has a suite reserved for preparations for this evening’s ceremony. Touching the chiffon again, my heart cries, it’s like a soft,floating cloud under my fingertips, the garment hugging me in all the right places.
This beauty has been hanging at the back of my closet for a week now, silently beckoning. So pretty. So perfect. And dammit, there’d been something deep inside my soul that desperately wanted—wants—to be that version of myself again. This dress was chosen by someone who loves me. In comparison, the gown I will wear today when I exchange vows with my dick of a fiancé was selected by his overpaid assistant. It’s too confining. Too stiff. Too formal. Too much of everything I’m not.
In my mind, I recite the note Jo had included with the shipment.
Noah,
This is the dress I hope you’ll wear on the happiest day of your life. It’s the only one that made your eyes mist and your heart sing. It’s the only one for my girl.
All my love,
Grandma Jo
My lips press together, staving off the sting that greets my eyes.Noah, just get it over with.Take it off. Put it back on the hanger. And don’t look at it ever again.
A huff climbs from my chest. Funny, somethingsimilar crossed my mind when I wrenched my gaze from Rhett nearly two weeks ago.Don’t look at him. Never again.And then, my heart was left behind in a cloud of dust. The closure I sought hadn’t helped one bit. Instead, a soul-deep ache has plagued me, every breath filling my lungs with agony. Like him, it’s time to let go. Reaching for the clasp in the back, my lips tremble.
