The regret on Sage’s face is unmistakable. “We can leave.”
I shrug. “No, it’s okay. Coming out tonight was alast-minute decision. No big deal. I haven’t seen the twins in forever. It might be good to catch up.”I wonder if they’re still as crazy as they used to be or if they’ve outgrown their wild.
Her lips twitch. “Noah, if you’re sure, we’ll stay, but if at any point you wanna leave, we can.” She glances at me, teeth clenched. “Do we need a safe word? You say it and we hightail it outta here?”
I can’t hold in my laugh. Smiling big, I shake my head. “I think we’re good.” I’m the fuckin’ best at hiding my true feelings. I gesture toward the booth, pull up my metaphorical big-girl britches, and lead the way even though my heart is in my throat. “Let’s join those two before they decide to order something that’ll get me completely wasted.” I glance at Sage. “Or maybe that’s not such a bad idea.” A chuckle bubbles from my chest that’s more about my discomfort with the current situation than actual amusement.
She gives me a look that screams,I don’t know who you’re trying to kid, but we totally need a safe word. “Fireball. Hot as balls. Jason Momoa.”
I raise my brows.
“Okay, okay, fine. How about pineapple? Godzilla?” She scrunches her nose. “Titanic!”
“Because the ship is going down?”
“Precisely. Weareabout to run into a Rhett-size iceberg.”
I send an elbow into her ribs, and mutter under my breath, “Hush, you.” As I duck into the U-shaped booth, everyone shifts to make room. With only two seats left, I end up sitting almost directly across from my past. I could make the girls get back out, ask to swap places with one of them so I don’t have to face my regrets, but I’m afraid of how it’d come across… to Sage… to Rhett… and most importantly, to myself. I drag a steadying breath into my lungs, then focus on my friends, plastering a bright smile on my face.Fake it ’til you make it, right?
“So.” Brandy interrupts the silence and cuts through the mounting tension that’s thick in the air. “Karaoke, yeah? Is that the plan?” Her gaze flicks toward me. “You should sit this one out, Noah. Small-town life isn’t really your vibe anymore.” Her tongue pokes out to dampen her lip as she stares—rather boldly—at Rhett. “Give the rest of us a chance to be the star of the show, would ya?”
“B!” Cassidy squeals, already halfway to inebriated from the tequila we had before we left Lilac Meadows. My eyes cut across the booth to Rhett, and for a brief moment, I’m taken right back to nights under the stars in a rusty orange pickup when I was the center of his universe and he was mine. He averts his focus to the bottom of his glass of bourbon, most likely wishing that it could wash away the bitter taste I left when I walked away.
Returning my focus to the girl I thought was my friend, it doesn’t escape me that Brandy is still eye-fucking Rhett. It wouldn’t take much more than a nod from him for her to jump across the table into his lap. I can’t believe I’m sitting right here, and she’s practically begging him to fuck her.
And maybe he already has.
Either way, it’s none of my business. Plastering on my stage smile, I pretend jealousy isn’t eating me alive. “Sounds perfect,Brandy.” I chuckle because it’s all I can do. “Wouldn’t want to upstage you.” The ache in my chest intensifies as Rhett watches my reaction from behind his amber-colored beverage. At my side, Sage reaches for my thigh under the table, firmly squeezing. She doesn’t have to say a word for me to understand that she’s here for me. Whatever I need. I might put on a good act, but she’s still my best friend… and while I can hide some things from her, to put it simply, this is…a lot.
Sage leans in with a soft chuckle. “What aboutwoodpecker?”
I laugh under my breath as the guy running the karaoke machine makes eye contact with our table and booms into the mic, “Who’s next? Brandy? Cassidy?”
“Ooh!” Cassidy exclaims excitedly, “What song do you wanna do?” She beams at her friend, a slight slur creeping into her words. “Youpick.”
Brandy’s lips purse before curving into a grin. “Maybe… ‘Jolene’?” Her eyes flick to mine, as if gauging my reaction.
Ofcourseshe’d selectthatsong. “Good choice.” I slide from the booth, making a shooing motion with my hand. “I’ll order our drinks. Get up there! The three of you should do that one together.” Sage scoots out of the booth but hesitates as the girls shimmy past us to take the stage. Her brow knits tightly together.
Leaning close to her, I whisper, “Go on. I’ll sing later. I need a minute.”
“Fat chance. Now would be a prime time for that safe word.” She takes hold of my elbow and guides me toward the bar. “But if you insist on staying, they still make your favorite huckleberry lemonade. Come on. We need a drink.”
As the first notes of “Jolene” play, Jeb slides our cocktails across the bar to us. After one long sip of the fruit-infused vodka drink, I know it will go straight to my head along with the tequila shots we had before we left Sage’s house. Skimming my finger over the ice-cold condensation on the exterior of the glass, I give myself a silent pep talk. The truth is, I’m terribly afraid that I might actually need liquid courage. Seems like if I’m going to survive tonight, I need to make a few extra wrong turns andreallyget lost.
Across the bar, I’m acutely aware of the boisterous conversation that continues at the booth. I wonder how Rhett’s truly been doing in the years since I left. The ache I felt earlier spreads throughout my body until I can hardly stand it. It’s true, I made these choices. I made this bed. And now I’ve gotta lie in it. I stare down into my drink as I take another long sip. Then, unable to stop myself, I steal another glance at him from under my lashes. I never expected him to wait around, butBrandy? Really? She’s supposed to be my friend. I could be overreacting. Maybe he never touched her. But she made a point of staking her claim back at the table. As if she wanted me to know in no uncertain terms that he is hers.
If it’snottrue, maybe he would have said something if not for the ring on my finger. But then, our eyes connect, and the lingering guilt confirms what I know deep down. Rhett has moved on. And I don’t have a say in it. But fuck him for sleeping with my friend. Andfuckher, too. I toss back the remains of my lemonade and catch Jeb’s attention. “Could I get another, please?”
“Sure darlin’. This one’s on the house for Black River’s very own claim to fame.”
I flash the well-meaning bartender my signature smile, summoning every bit of the actress in me that appears night after night when I’m on the road touring. Over the last few years, I’ve performed for massivethrongs of people at every concert, appearance, and music festival while I’ve wanted to do nothing but leave the stage to nurse my confusion over what my life has become. Not a single person has ever known my inner turmoil because I don’t want them to see that. I’ve never let on for an instant that everything isn’t exactly perfect in my world, and I’m not gonna fucking start now.
While I wait for my beverage, a whoop of laughter from behind grabs my attention and, against my better judgment, I glance over my shoulder only to find Rhett’s dark eyes lingering. They stay there as if pulled by an invisible force… drawn to me. Just like mine are to him. Our attraction has always been undeniable. I’m the magnet. He’s the steel. But the way we left things—or rather, how I left him—well, that damage might just be irreparable.
Somehow while I’ve been waxing poetic over the state of the life I gave up, I completely missed that the song has wrapped up. The girls return to the table, a whirlwind of laughter and obnoxious smiles. As they sit back down, Brandy urges Rhett to make room, and she wraps her arms around his neck, pressing close. It’s enough to sour my stomach.
Over Brandy’s shoulder, Rhett smiles uncomfortably at me and disentangles himself from her koala hold. He even carries on his end of the conversation with Kade.But… My lips purse. He can’t fool me. I know him. Maybe better than I know myself.
