It’s a tired excuse to blame his temper on some rage-button genetics in his family. It fixes nothing, but at least he apologized.Most of the time, I don’t even get that, so I stopped calling him out on it a long time ago.
Sighing, I hate that I’m giving in. “I’m not happy about the Florida trip, but I know it’s important to you, so we’ll go. Can we at least try to make it as affordable as possible?” I ask, bracing for the inevitable push for luxury accommodations.
Ray’s satisfied smirk grates on my nerves. “I heard from Mac this morning. He’s excited we’re coming. I’ll send you the details so you can book everything. Flights are up to you, but everyone’s staying at the same hotel, so it is what it is. I’m busy editing and posting yesterday’s content, so I need you to take care of it.”
As usual, my job and what I have time for hardly matter.
“Fine, I’ll get right on that,” I mutter sarcastically. “The sooner we book, the better the deal.”
“Thanks, babe. This trip could really boost our subscriber base. You know how hard I’ve been working toward that,” he says as he walks away.
My gut churns with a tumultuous mix of fury, frustration, and self-loathing. Fuck my life. Why do I cave to his bullshit? I’m the one with the good job, the education, and the income. He’d be nowhere without me, yet every day it feels the opposite. I let him have his way because it’s easier than fighting him.
I grab a snack from the kitchen and head back to my office when my phone buzzes with a text.
Heather: Hey, you busy? Need to chat when you’re free.
This isn’t what I need right now. I love my sister, but she’s challenging on a good day. She’s a family law attorney and does not have an off switch.
Jay: I’m free now.
Seconds later, my phone rings.
“Hey, little brother,” Heather says. “How’s life?”
“Things are fine,” I lie.
I’m always cautious about what I tell her about my life. She knows I’m unhappy with Ray, whom she never liked to begin with, but doesn’t know how bad it really is. Heather would lose her shit if she knew half of what he says and does. She’s always been protective of me, especially since I came out in high school.
“Good to hear. Mom and I are going on our cruise next month for her birthday. I still wish you were coming,” she says, laying it on thick.
I sigh. “We talked about this. Our budget’s tight,” I remind her, my tension rising.
“I’m just teasing you,” she says. “I was thinking, after we get back, we should throw Mom a party to celebrate her birthday. Nothing fancy, just at her house.”
“That’s a great idea. Let’s plan it for after you get back. I’ll help with any arrangements you need.”
“Awesome, thanks. She’s done a lot for us, and I want to make sure she feels appreciated,” she responds.
Our mom has had a tough time since we moved from Rochester to Portland before my senior year of high school. Heather wasin Seattle for college, my dad had a new job, and my coming out—when I was literally caught with my pants down—ultimately led to the end of my parents’ marriage. My mom and I struggled, but we’ve worked through it. My dad disappeared completely, wanting nothing to do with us, especially me.
“Thanks for planning the party. I wish I could go with you on the cruise.”
“Jay, it’s okay,” she says, sounding sympathetic for once. “So, what’s new with you? Do you and Ray have any fun plans this summer?”
“Nothing special. Still saving for Alaska,” I lie again.
I’m not about to tell her about Florida. She knows about our social media, but she’s in the dark about OnlyFans. Mentioning a last-minute trip to Florida would raise too many questions.
We talk for a few more minutes, catching up on our jobs and the fun plans she has for the cruise, before I hang up and go back to work.
Once I’m done, I book the cheapest flights to Florida I can find and begrudgingly submit my vacation time I don’t want to use. It’s just another compromise, and another push into a corner.
Chapter 3
Aiden
I’m leaving for Florida tomorrow, so I’m packing before meeting my friend Lauren for dinner at our favorite sushi spot in Manhattan. I’ve mastered the art of packing light. Since fashion isn’t essential for me, my standard wardrobe consists of track pants, basketball shorts, t-shirts, tank tops, and cross-trainers. Working in adult content, I’m usually naked anyway. I only dress up when it truly matters.
