Chapter Twelve
Lilith
The hours drift by slowly while I’m forced to sit at the table, putting on a smile. I can’t lie, though, the food was amazing. Finger food to start, a whole rack of lamb on a bed of fresh veg, then a selection of tarts, cakes, and other sweet treats to top it off.
And that’s where this night was meant to end.
We met. We ate. We were done.
That’s easy for me to say. I’m stuck in this chair watching Mom and Mr. Crawford playing footsie under the table, while Colter keeps trying to make idle small talk.I don’t give him the satisfaction of getting it. He’s the one who put me into this mood of annoyance and rebellion, so he deserves what he gets.
Talking to Misha by text made it easier for a while. It was a great distraction from him, and them, until she dropped out on me. Just my luck? My best friend’s the only girl in the city who can’t stay up after nine p.m.
“You really ought to relax,” Colter says suddenly.
I don’t have to face him to know he’s staring at me again. His eyes give me the same feeling I got when I walked out of Dr. Rice’s office. A sort of prickling on the skin I can’t put into any one particular category. Thrilled, scared, angry, or a combination of it all…
I can’t tell, and I don’t know if I want to find out.
The worst part is how much I hate to admit my heart starts galloping when I do notice. As if it’s betraying me with desires the rest of me can’t get behind. I keep telling myself that it’s because I had the biggest crush on this guy when I was younger.
I think about what Dr. Rice might say. I suppose this is one of the topics I should bring up in our next session. But how do I sayI like being looked at by dangerous-looking menwithout sounding crazy…
“I am relaxed.” Fiddling with my napkin isn’t doing me any favors in selling the lie.
It’s funny looking over at our parents and seeing Alistair giggling with Mom like they’re naughty kids doingsomething they shouldn’t. God, what I wouldn’t give to be closer to them. To drown out whatever is happening inside me with their gushy, lovey-dovey nonsense.
“They could be at it for hours,” Colter reaffirms my fears of how long this might go on. “We might as well get acquainted in the meantime.”
“I’ll take a raincheck.” Getting to know my future stepbrother isn’t high on my priority list, given how this evening started.
“Feisty,” he scoffs.
Warmth creeps up my body and rests on my cheeks. I bring the napkin up to my mouth, to wipe away some non-existent crumb in order to hide my reaction. I’m suffering enough as is without adding embarrassment to the list.
“Hey, you two,” Alistair calls from his end of the table, a beaming smile stretching from ear to ear. “Sorry to get in the way of yoursiblingbonding, but we have something we’d like to say.”
Colter turns to his father, and I breathe a much-needed sigh of relief.
“Now, Lilith, I know we haven’t had much time to get to know one another,” he starts, “but your mother and I have been working on this for quite some time.”
Mom takes his hand, brushing her thumb over his knuckles while he speaks.
“I’m not one for soppy speeches, so let me cut straight to it,” Alistair continues, looking down at Mom. “Seeing Lilith and Colter getting along fills me with so much joy.”
Yup, that confirms it. They haven’t left their own little world for a second to see how things were really going with the kids.
“We’re set to marry next weekend. But I can’t wait that long to bring you into our lives fully. Your mother and I have spoken about it, Lilith, and I’d be honored if you’d accept my humble request.”
I don’t like where this is going. Whatever it is, it feels as if I’m being pushed into a corner I won’t be able to fight my way out of, and he hasn’t even gotten to the point yet.
“And that is?” I’m shaking like a leaf caught in a tornado.
Mom’s grip tightens on Alistair’s hand, as if giving him the courage to go on.
“I’d like you to move in with us,” he says, adding, as if it weren’t evident. “Both of you, of course.”
“But we are moving in,” I say, the doubt and terror of his request melting away in an instant. “After the wedding. Mom’s given me a full rundown of the plan.”
