“I want to believe that, Frost, but it’s not so easy.”
“And as long as you allow that to be your excuse, you will never move ahead into all that’s good for you. You can’t have a future with Sevyn without letting go of your past with Lena. It’s not fair to her, and it’s not fair to you.”
I dragged my hand over my face and sighed. I just wanted to disappear and make all the shit stop. I needed the world to quit spinning for a few minutes because I was overwhelmed.
“Aye, what’s good?” Frost spoke to someone behind me as he got off his stool and dapped them up.
I felt a hand on my shoulder, and someone spun me around. Ready to go off again, I paused when I saw it was Asad.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Asad asked.
“What are you doing here?”
“Frost called and told me to get over here and get you home where you belonged, with your woman, before you screwed up a good thing. What’re you doing, Deuce?”
I shook my head, not wanting to explain everything to my brother. He was a good man, and he was a great brother, but sometimes he didn’t understand everything. I didn’t need the headache of his judgment or reprimands. It was enough that I confided in Frost. He had given me all the advice that I needed. I didn’t need to confide in anyone else.
“I just had a rough day today. You remember my old partner?”
“Yeah, Lena,” he stated softly. “Something happen with the case?”
“No. They’re going to be doing jury selection soon. But today was her birthday. It seemed like no matter how hard I tried to outrun her memories, she was everywhere I turned. I actually went out on a call today where the woman’s name was Lena. My head is just messed up, Asad.”
“I hear you. I can’t imagine what you’re going through, but you need to call it a night before you end up in trouble. No one wants to see you on the other side of those bars with the people you throw behind them.”
“Yeah, ’specially not me.”
“I’ll give you a ride home. Frost has already arranged to take your car home to you tomorrow. You gotta work in the morning?”
I shook my head no.
“A’ight, let’s roll.”
“I can drive, Asad. I’m clear.”
“No the fuck you can’t. Nigga, your words have been slurred since I came down here. You’ve been trying to fight anyone who looked at you the wrong way, and you’ve been drinking way too much. You not ’bout to have your brothers in blue rolling up inhere trying to shut me down on some bullshit because you had a DUI. Besides, I refuse to be the one to explain to your parents why we have to bail you out—or standing at your grave.”
“For real. You’re tripping, Deuce. That’s never been you. You’ve always had a bug up your ass about folks who drink and drive,” Asad professed.
I pressed the heel of my hands against my forehead. “A’ight, damn. Just get me out of here. My head ringing like a muthafucka.”
“Yeah, he’s definitely drunk. This nigga hardly ever uses that word,” Frost stated.
“Who you telling?” Asad replied.
“Thanks for coming through, Asad. I could’ve taken him, but I’ve got a meeting in a few minutes,” Frost stated, dapping Asad up.
“No problem, cuz. Thanks for calling.”
“You take it easy, big homie,” Frost ordered, dapping me up and giving me a side hug too.
I stumbled just a little bit, and he and my brother caught me. “Whoa. Careful, Mr.-I-Can-Drive-I’m-Clear,” Frost stated.
“Yeah, you’re definitely not driving,” Asad declared.
Once we made it to the parking lot and into Asad’s car, I knew that I couldn’t go home. I realized just how messed up I was when I tripped over the curb, and my brother had to catch me. I felt stupid as shit. I had never drunk this much before, not even when Lena first died.
Once I was in the car, I rested my head against the headrest. “Asad, you gotta do me a favor, man.”
