I noticed his arm was still wrapped around me. I leaned into him and whispered, “Thank you so much, Deuce. For everything.”
“Serving you is my pleasure, Sevyn.” He released me and stood. “I’ll let you have some time alone with your grandmother’s memories.”
I nodded as he walked away. I sat for another ten minutes before I stood and made my way slowly back to his truck where he leaned against the hood. He was on the phone with someone, and his eyes twinkled with laughter as he listened. He wrapped his call up as I drew close.
“You good?” he asked, moving to open the car door for me.
“Yeah. Thank you for doing this. It meant more than you could have imagined. I feel like my soul was cleansed and another part of me has been healed.”
He smiled and pulled me into his arms. I felt peace and joy in his arms, and I found that I didn’t want to ever leave them.
“I just want you to be happy, Sevyn. No matter what I have to sacrifice to make that happen, it is a privilege and an honor.”
His words, though meant to be strong and encouraging, broke me. I fell apart in that parking lot right there in his arms. I sobbed a deep, soul-wrenching cry, and he just held me tight in those massive, tattooed arms of his. Deuce kissed the top of my head and squeezed me against him. My heart melted just a little more.
ONE MONTH LATER
I had finished a twelve-hour shift,and I would be off for the next three days. Waverleigh had taken Sevyn back and forth to her therapy appointments the last couple of days, but I was picking her up as a surprise today. We hadn’t seen much of each other, since she had been asleep every night when I got in.
I took my usual seat at the far corner of the room, just out of sight so that I would not be a distraction to her. The minute that I sat down, I saw her fall. She had been working on walking without the aid of a cane.
I did something that I seldom did; I rushed to her assistance. I wasn’t sure if it was because I had missed her so desperately orwhat. Both Derek and I always encouraged her to remain strong and not rely on self-pity whenever she failed at something, but to press through it to achieve her goal.
At the moment, I didn’t give a shit about any of that. I just wanted to be by her side.
“Hey, it’s all good,” I declared, lowering beside her to help her up.
She looked more mortified when she noticed that I was there than she had been before. I immediately regretted my decision to race to her side, but I didn’t back down.
“I feel like such a failure sometimes. I feel like I’ll never be able to do anything on my own again,” she whimpered.
After I had her standing, I gripped her chin and stared into her eyes. “You can’t think like that, and you should quit saying stuff like that. You’re strong, smart, and independent, but your resolve has been weakened by life’s challenges. I see the fire in your eyes, and I know that strength and determination lives inside of you. Tap into it and uncover it. Okay?”
“You’re right, Deuce.”
I walked away and watched as she continued the remainder of her exercise. I had stopped by Off The Bone, a popular barbeque shack, for our dinner. I didn’t want her to have to worry about waiting for me to cook or reheating anything.
We took turns cooking. It usually took her a lot longer than me because she had to use the cane to navigate around the kitchen. But she would start earlier in the morning. When she had first started cooking, I told her that she didn’t have to worry about it. I would cook because I had to eat one way or another, but she insisted that she wanted to do her part, so I let her.
I drove us back to my place after her therapy appointment concluded. She was mostly quiet on the ride home, and I was lost in my own thoughts as I had been all day. At some point, sheturned on the music and bobbed her head softly to a Jovi Noelle soundtrack.
“Aren’t you going to eat?” she asked, after we arrived back at my house and I had laid the food out for her.
“I will. I’m not hungry right now, so I’ll just take a shower and then eat.”
“Okay. You want me to wait for you?”
“No. You’re good.”
I headed into my room and closed the door behind me. I fell onto my back and pressed my fists against my closed eyes. If I could press all the thoughts, memories, and pain away with that simple action, I would. But I couldn’t, so instead, I remained on my back resting for as long as possible.
Eventually, I stripped out of my clothes and put my gun, badge, and all my equipment away before I padded into the bathroom to shower. My home had a roommate layout, with the master bedroom on one side of the house and the other two bedrooms and two bathrooms on the opposite side.
The living room, dining room, and half bathroom sat in the middle of the space. That was one reason I hadn’t minded bringing Sevyn back to my place when she lost hers. I knew that there was enough space for us to peacefully coexist without getting in one another’s way.
I had planned to sell my home and find something that was more suitable for Lena and me. I had wanted her input on the house that we bought because I wanted her to be happy.
Knowing that she was carrying my child made me certain that our house wasn’t perfect for us. As much as I loved my home, I knew that I wouldn’t be okay with having our baby, or a small child as they grew older, on the opposite side of the house. It made it difficult to protect them or know what was going on with them.
