“What are we doing today?”
Allison shuts down her phone and raises her sunglasses, letting them sit on top of her head.
“We could cross something off the list.” She suggests, and I don’t like how my eyes tried to search for West when she said that. In some deep, dark,twistedway, it has become a bit ofourthing…
“I don’t know…” I trail off, trying not to deal with the reality that West is now in fact my friend and that friends like doing things together.
“I know I’m no Evil Spawn, but I don’t fall very short.” She jokes, and I turn serious.
“Alls no, you know you’re one of the most important people in my life.”
She rolls her eyes as if that was obviously known, but I know her. She isn’t jealous of West, but I feel like she feels like, after all these years, I’m inching closer to West than her, and beneath all that confidence is a terrifying insecurity that she’s going to end up alone. And I could never. I don’t think I could ever walk through life without her by my side, daring me to do stupid shit.
“Well,duh, look at you being all sentimental!” She side-hugs me, and this timeIroll my eyes. “Pull up the list.”
I open my phone and then go to the Never list.
“I could learn how to ride a bike?” I squint, and sure enough, she shakes me from the side.
“That’s perfect! But wait… I wouldn’t want to steal that moment from your dad… Let’s call him, and I’ll watch from the side.” She shrugs, and soon enough, we’re putting our tops and shorts back on.
I’m actually glad West is busy mowing the lawn, because I wouldn’t want him to joke about all the times I’m going to fall for sure.
“Mr. B, I’ve done it once again. Mads is ready to ride a bike!” She exaggeratedly gestures towards me, and I sigh, regretting this by the minute.
“Really? I’m getting the safety pads!” And he moves all clumsily towards the garage.
How could she leave him?
It’s something I hate to admit, but still think about at least once a day. It hits me when I least expect it, too. Mainly when I’m with Dad. But sometimes when I’m at Mailview’s only beach, where they supposedly had their first kiss. When I see my friends’ parents interact and be, you know,together. I don’t know, lifereallylikes to kick me around sometimes.
I shake my head and hear my dad ringing his old bike’s bell, smiling all excited.
Last time I rode a bike, I must’ve been around six or seven. For some, it might have looked like a learning experience; for me personally, it was my own personal hell, where I ended up full of bruises even though I wore everything safety-related. I got frustrated, kicked the bike, hurt my foot, my parents had to take me to the hospital, and they told me I sprained my ankle. In elementary school, I threw myself down four stairs so I would be hurt for P.E. and wouldn’t have to learn how to ride a bike. The signs that I was crazy were there.
And now, my head is shooting off alarms that I should lick the ground and catch some type of cold so I don’t have to do this. I’m in the middle of one of Mailview’s less-travelled dirt paths, and I’m praying that some brat doesn’t appear out of nowhere to point their tiny finger at the 17-year-old who can’t ride a bike without, erm,support.
My dad is holding onto the back of the bike, and I’m all geared up. Allison is… Recording.
“You can do this, Mads!”
“Allison, I’m not six for fuck’s sake, stop recording!”
“Language!You’re doing so good, honey!” The man switches tones as if it’s nothing, and I painfully and slowlypeddle.
“Dad, I don’t think I can do this…” I glance sideways at my best friend. “Allison,I swear to god!”
“Sorry, I just really wanna catch you on camera!” She points excitedly, and I roll my eyes.
“Don’t focus on her, Maddie, focus on me, I got you…”
I squint my eyes, but then remember I should have them open.
Just peddle. I keep glancing at the ground, and then I lose balance.
“I got you, don’t look at the ground, look forward!”
“I am looking forward!” I shout back, my helmet pressing against my head. “Oh, I hate this…”
