CHAPTER FORTY-SIX
Grant
Poppy sighs, weary and worldly in a way only a tiny four-year-old can be.
“Why did you have to do shopping today? I wanted to play with Mr. Bingley and Sam.”
In the rearview, I see her slump as much as she can in her car seat considering the five-point harness securing her.
“He already said. Were you listening? We needed clothes.” Lily isn’t pleased with our afternoon, either, but she’s a little more understanding.
“Lily grew enough her pants are too short. Normally, I shop online for you two, but every once in a blue moon, we need to go to a store and try things on so we know what fits best.” Especially shoes. I’ve had enough of guessing which shoes to buy in which sizes. Soccer season a year ago taught me that. Silverton offers a decent sporting goods store for things like cleats, but we have to go all the way to Ogden orLayton to find bigger stores where they can try on a larger selection.
I don’t love doing it, but we only make the trek every so often, and when we do, we visit a few other locales Juniper View and even Silverton don’t have. Nothing like a Trader Joe’s load to make a man feel ready to tackle weekly meal planning.
“Can we stop at the castle park?” Lily asks, energy in her voice like the very idea of a park has imbued her with new life.
“Yes! Castle park! Please, Daddy?” Poppy, too, has been reanimated by the idea.
I check the time. The frozen goods from the store are nestled into a large cooler I brought along and if they aren’t thawed by now, they’ll make it another half hour. Spur-of-the-moment plans aren’t my forte, but these girls are teaching me some of our best moments come from saying yes and rolling with it.
In fact, every good thing in my life in the last few years has come from yes, including a woman I’m more than a little anxious to get back to. But she’s busy with homework, so staying away a little longer won’t hurt. I’m trying to give her space. We’ve said the big three words, so I know she cares for me. But I can’t crowd her and push her or be with her every second I want to, or I risk overdoing it and losing her. I’ve pushed in the past and what did it get me? Single parenting, the end of a long-term relationship, and the sense that it was all wrong the whole time. So I won’t push, but I will keep saying yes.
Now that I’ve had this blissful glimpse, I don’t know how I’ll survive it if I mess it up.
So for now, castle park time. There are heavy clouds in the sky but unless we see lightning,we’ll be fine.
By the time we reach the park which is about halfway between Silverton and Juniper View near Renew Day Spa that has expanded into a small oasis between the towns, there are heavy droplets plunking on the windshield. I’ve only seen one flash of lightning and it’s been minutes since I’ve seen another. I’m internally debating whether we should bag it and keep driving when my phone rings.
My heart lights up when I see her name.Sam Ellis.
“Hey, how’s the homework going?”
The girls are clamoring out of the car as I answer, so I guess that decides that. They’ve never been afraid of a little rain, and if we were home, I have no doubt they’d be begging for umbrellas so they could literally stand around and sing in the rain, the nuts.
“Hi there. I’d like to place an order for delivery.”
I pull back, confirm it’s Sam, and chuckle. “Oh, would you? What can I bring you?” Outside, Poppy and Lily are twirling around, looking up and welcoming the rain on their faces.
“Some of the legendary Naan Time food.”
I blink again and finally, it hits me. She’s not being silly or playing a game. She’s never done that anyway, and I’m the lovesick fool completely missing that something is very off here.
“What’s wrong? Where are you?” I ask, voice low as I take a measured breath in to calm my jolting pulse.
“I was just telling my friend he’s got to taste it. He’s from LA and he won’t believe how good it is.”
My stomach bottoms out. “Are you safe? I’m coming. I’m coming now.”
“We’ll take the family special. Yes, that’s great, thanks so much. How long for delivery to the house, do you think? Iknow it’s rainy and all.” Her voice shows the first signs of emotion and my heart cracks.
“Twenty minutes. I’ll be there in twenty. You’ll be okay, Sam. I’m coming.”
“Thanks so much. See you soo?—”
The line cuts off.
My mind clears. Every bit of panic in me subsides, a plan snapping into sharp relief.
