That’s it. And I suppose I didn’t give him much to begin with.
We don’t talk again, and neither do the girls. I wonder if they’re awake, but I don’t dare peek and disturb them. When we pull into the driveway of his house and park, one of them lets out a soft snore.
“Need help getting them inside?”
“No.”
It’s instant, and not cutting, but so definite, I’m almost embarrassed I asked.
“Sorry, I don’t mean to sound short. I appreciate the offer.”
I nod, then realize he might not be able to see me. “Any time.”
Happily, I mean it. I loved getting to see the girlsinteract with their family—Grant’s family. They’re adorable and he’s so sweet with them, spending time with them wouldn’t be a hardship.
After exiting the car, I head toward the garage apartment, but stop short before he opens Poppy’s door.
“Hey, Grant?”
He turns to look at me, that masculine profile of his sending a weighty flash of awareness through me.
“I’m sorry about earlier. I just…” How can I explain the panic I felt at the thought of getting in the car with him? The gnawing irritation and sense that if I did, he’d somehow see it as a victory over me, like he’s exactly the same as my ex and not a completely different person? The relief that let me take a full breath for the first time in hours once May messaged to offer the ride.
I’m not proud of it, especially now with new insights into him. Still. I’m just trying to figure myself out and trust my gut again.
“I’m glad you came, Sam. Have a good night.”
“You, too.” My voice is nothing in the night air, but our gazes stay locked from twenty feet apart until he turns back to his task of unloading his kids.
I want to stay out and look at the stars—count how many more I can see here. Maybe part of me even wants to see him carrying his daughters inside, but I’m aware enough to know that’s a mistake. It’s been a beautiful evening, but as lovely as it was, I’m feeling a little bruised by it. I’m feeling my broken pieces in the face of such wholeness, and it’s best if I go inside.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Grant
It’s a full six days before I see Sam again after the dinner at my parents’ house.
We cracked open one of our mystery cases thanks to Hughes’s run-in with the culprit. At least one ongoing issue is case closed.
I haven’t been thinking of Sam, or how she’s doing, or wondering what she would’ve said if she’d finished her sentence about not waiting for me to drive her to dinner. It doesn’t matter. She let me drive her home.
It’s fair to say I haven’t been welcoming or particularly likeable, but the idea that she’s scared of me or even simply uncomfortable around me? It doesn’t make me angry. It doesn’t have me clenching my fists and wanting to pummel whoever did this to her.
It makes me ill.
I want the people in my life, my town, and my county tobe safe. I want women to feel free, protected, and valued. And this woman?
Knowing a little of what she’s been through based on seeing that LAPD file that must’ve contained something about domestic abuse, I can’t stand the thought that I’ve let my grumpy, protective ass make her feel anything other than welcome and safe and at home here.
Thinking of her at my family’s dinner table, laughing at Finn’s antics or being so sweet to Lil, and imagining her in any other state, any situation that would distress her or harm her… It damn near guts me.
“Are you going to lunch with Dec?” Brian peeks into my doorway.
“Yep. Meeting him and Finn in ten. Want me to bring you back something?” I click out of a few windows cluttering up my screen from the morning’s work.
“Nah. I’ll walk with you, if that’s alright. You guys hitting Jerry’s?”
When I nod, we plan to meet out front in a few minutes. I’m glad to have time with him. He’s been taking the jobs farther out, leaving me to stay in town. I appreciate him and wonder if he ever resents that I’m sheriff since he’s got seniority on the force. Sheriff Otero had come to me and asked if I was interested in being the interim when he left eighteen months before his term ended. I’d never even considered it, and I’d only been in town a year.
