Rafael
“I don’t know why you don’t go on a long vacation somewhere. Go spend a month on the beach, slipping off into margarita comas every night.”
I laugh, holding the phone closer to my ear. “Because you know damn well that isn’t me. I have to be doing more than that.”
“Lo se.” Derick sighs. “I’m your little brother; I’m supposed to give you a hard time for being a stubborn ass.”
“And you’re doing a good job,” I say, in between chuckles. “But you and I both know I’m stuck in my ways. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.”
“Sí, and your ass is as old as they come,” he chirps.
I roll my eyes, knowing it’s pointless, because he can’t see me when we’re in two different states. “You’re not too young yourself. I’m only six years older than you.”
“Yeah, but you’ve hit the age of retirement.”
I scoff. “From the army at age forty-two.”
“Still. Next time I talk to you, you’ll probably tell me about all the sweaters you knitted and your herb garden.”
Opening the fridge, I reach for a water bottle and twist the cap with my elbow as I slam the door shut with my back. “I was thinking more like potholders and something for Leslie to tie over your mouth to keep you from talking so much shit.”
“Sounds too kinky for Leslie.”
I spit my water out after my first sip. “Look, as much as I’d love to keep this fun conversation going, I need to get some yard work done before Clara next door reminds me of the HOA rules.”
“Good ole Clara. Now there’s someone who needs a hobby.”
“Yeah, I’ll gift her some knitting needles and cilantro seeds.”
“Good to see something might come of my brilliant ideas after all. Call me and let me know how the side gig is going. Stop being such a recluse over there in that big house of yours.”
Leaning against the counter, I scrub a hand over my face. “It’s not that big, and a guy like me needs a lot of room to walk around in at night.”
“Ah, still sleepwalking I see.”
“Yup. It’s gotten bad again after not having much to do and leaving my house less.” And when I leave the house before waking, bad things happen. Most I can’t remember. I’m waitingfor some of it to come back and bite me in the ass, but none of what I’ve done while lacking clarity has caught up to me yet. He knows about it but likes to shove it under the rug and pretend it isn’t there most days after helping me cover my tracks.
“And that’s why you need to come visit soon. We all miss you. You’re no longer in the service and can live wherever you want. It would certainly make everything easier.”
His way of slightly bringing up the unavoidable without bringing it up. “Except I’ve built my life here.”
“What life?”
I roll my eyes, turning around to remove my toast from the toaster. “My house and job. I’m comfortable where I am. I’ve finally gotten to know my neighbors’ names and I have favorite restaurants I go to.”
“A house and restaurants? That’s what’s keeping you there?”
“It’s more about what it’s keeping me away from.”
He sighs. “He moved out into the country, so the chances of you ever running into him—”
“There’s still a chance. We both love Christmas and more than likely will end up at the same places in town.” Or I might slip into my car while sleeping and drive to his parents’ house like I did last time I visited my family. Awake me knew what we had was over, but unconscious me has not fully come to terms with it. Or with the law, apparently. I plate my food, reaching for the jelly in the nearby cabinet.
He sighs. “Look, I just miss you, okay. Ma does too, and so does everyone else.”
“I’m sure your wife doesn’t miss me starting small fires with matches at midnight.”
He lets out a snort. “No, but we’re not opposed to tying your ass to the bed when you stay over again.”
