Not with Mo.
Two, because he didn’t like strippers.
That was clear.
He might have been diplomatic during our first talk, thoughhehadindicated he had a problem with it.
And he was not mean to the girls at Smithie’s.
He was also not friendly.
Then of course there was that part of his outburst, the partI likedthe best(not), where he’d said,Every night, you dance,and you got a huge room full of men gagging for it.
He thought I got off on it.
And okay, if I took a second to calm down and reflect (whichI didnot), there might be something about that.
It still wasn’t cool he threw it in my face and the way hedid.
But I knew that about myself.
I liked attention.
When I was younger, I went to LA to become an actress.
I ended up Queen of the Corvette Calendar because, first,how kickass was that?And second, I sucked at acting.And last, there was anoperative word in that title.
Queen.
My sister was quiet and sweet and responsible andhardworking, and everyone adored her.
But I was not any of that.Not even close.
This wasn’t sibling rivalry.
At least (if I was honest), not anymore.
And Jet didn’t getallthe attention, but everyonearound us made sure she (and thus I) knew how awesome she was for being sweetand responsible and hardworking.
“Oh, what a good girl she is, looking after that wild sisterof hers while Nancy’s at work,” and, “Oh, it just breaks my heart Jet had toget a job so she could help her momma out with the bills.”
That said, years ago (around about the time we were in aroom when bullets were flying), I’d grown up enough to see that my sisterdidn’t have it all that great, what with our not-so-stellar life with adeadbeat dad who kept us all on a string with fancy plans and big promises.
I also saw how responsible and hardworking she’d had to beand that she’d sacrificed a lot for me.
I appreciated it.
And I loved her for it.
I also moved on.
From that.
Not so much the fact our dad was a loser.
And I was honest enough with myself I knew that I was thatgirl who needed to be daddy’s little girl.Daddy’s princess.His sun and moonand stars.The girl he threatened all herboyfriendsso they wouldn’t hurt her, but mostly he was working out his issues because hedidn’t want to let her go.The girl he choked up about when he gave her away ather wedding.
Our dad had gotten his shit together.
