Though the first night I was onstage, Axl, Auggie and Magwere sitting front row to the side.
Not to watch me strip.
To make sure I was good my first night without Mo at myback.
Boone was working some other job.
Vance, Hector and Ren with their women, Jules, Sadie andAlly, as well as my sister, by the way, were sitting at the table next to them.
Eddie was at home with the boys (doing this avoiding havingto watch me dance).
Jet, Jules, Sadie and Ally watched me dance.
Vance, Hector and Ren engaged in an apparently deepconversation while I danced.
I was loved.
And it was good to be loved.
But now, I wasn’t feeling that goodness.
For nearly a month, being officially together for a two anda half weeks of that, Mo and I spent all our time together when we weren’tworking.We slept at his house, or mine, depending on a variety of factors.
He had a razor, shave cream and bodywash in my bathroom anda drawer and a rail full of clothes in my closet.
I doubled up onallmy stuff, including a ton ofmakeup, a hairdryer and curling irons (that was fun, more fun, Mo was a man whodidn’t mind shopping—I had his sisters to thank for a lot, something I wasgoing to get a chance to do that night).And since his big master closet wasfar from full, I’d filled my own rail and two drawers.
Neither of us was fucking around.
This was it.
He was the one.
I was his one.
And both of us knew it.
It hadn’t been years, but we now had some time in and inthat time, not once since Mo started sleeping at my side did he get up beforeseven in the morning.
No nightmares.
All good.
Until now.
And I had no clue what to do.
“Youwannatalk about it?”Iasked.
“No,” he answered.
“Do you need to go work out or something?”
“Maybe.”
“Wanna fuck?”I offered.
“Lottie, you don’t have to fuck me every time I have a baddream.”
