“It’s my fault,” Selene said, after Father had spoken to her about the danger she’d put them both in by crossing that wall. “I wish the king had whipped me instead.”
Father shook his head. “Be grateful the days of whipping boys are over, Selene. It’s terrible to carry the burden of someone else’s sins.”
She took the scarf off her neck and handed it to Father. “Take this, I don’t deserve it.”
Father kissed her on the top of her head. “Enjoy this gift, Nightingale. Let go of your guilt. Life is too short for sorrow.”
She hadn’t worn this scarf in years. In the days when she had still held out hope that he would come for her, she’d worn it every day. Dreaming that he would come and take her past the edge of the sea and free her from her sadness. After a while, she’d folded it up and put it at the back of her drawer. Her only hope in forgetting.
Selene leaned against the stone guard. The air was crisp and cold up here. Selene took each breath slowly, savoring the scent of smoke from the chimneys that rose from the city like seedlings.
“It’s beautiful.” She glanced back.
“Is it?” Gigi had pressed herself against the copper dome, as far away from the edge as she could manage.
“You made yourself fly today.” Selene raised an eyebrow. “And now you’re afraid to fall?”
Gigi laughed. “It’s not the same, and you know it.”
Selene moved to Gigi and rested against the dome. The sun-warmed copper felt good against her back.
“This is it.” Selene intertwined her fingers with Gigi’s. “The beginning of the end.”
“It’s already begun.” Gigi squeezed Selene’s hand. “It’s been here, for a while.”
A different sort of ache permeated her chest. Not fractured love and jealousy, but the finality of this moment. Soon enough they’d leave the Opera Magique. Their lives would go on separately. Selene wouldn’t settle for anything other than the King’s Mage. Gigi could end up in a noble house, singing lovely distractions for those who could afford it. Their art could take them all over the world. Mondreves was the center of magic, creating trends and precedent for the other nations. Every history book she read boasted their influence and power over the known world. Did any of them have beautiful boys trapped in mirrors who bled power? Selene shook the thought from her head. After all of this, Gigi would marry Benson and have beautiful, talented children. And all of this would fade into fond memory.
Like the way things had happened with Victor. She’d thought for so long that he’d find her here and return her to the life she’d had before. That she’d have another chance at mischief and joy. That things could go back. But time was fluid. It slipped between her fingers, always changing, flowing forward with little regard to what was left behind.
Selene’s head spun, suddenly dizzy. Maybe it was the view of the palace. Maybe it was the altitude. Maybe it was the clear, cloudless sky.
Selene looked up sharply, the weight of the goblet against her palm. There wasn’t a cloud to be seen. No hope of rain or mist or anything she could capture and take with her down below. Her heart sank quicker than a girl thrown off the side of an opera house.
“Where do you think we’ll end up?” Gigi said.
They’d played this game a thousand times. Wondering about what life would be after this was all over. Selene had always been so confident. Sure that she would be the one in the palace. She wasn’t so sure about that now.
“If it’s not the palace, I don’t want it.”
“Do you think you’ll make it into L’Opéra du Magician?” Gigi said gently.
“There’s still a chance.” Selene would make a chance. A door where there was not a door. “Priya’s audition didn’t go well, either.”
“I’m just worried about you.” Gigi sucked in her lower lip. She was holding something back. Keeping secrets, like Selene.
“Say it.”
“Your audition. Your obsession. I know it wasn’t what you meant to do, but the magic got out of hand so quickly. Is it really worth it?” The words rushed out of Gigi. “Selene, you could have died. You could havekilledsomeone.”
Selene tried to forget the way the lightning had volleyed across the auditorium and what lightning had done to her father. There was blood on her hands and in her head and in her heart. Would Gigi still love her, if she knew? Would anyone? The only person who hadn’t run from her was the boy who lived in the dark.
“I had it under control.”
“After all we’ve been through.” Gigi pressed her hand into Selene’s shoulder. “Don’t you think I know the truth? I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
Selene counted her breaths and the measures of silence that stretched between them. Didn’t Gigi understand? There was nothing else for Selene.
“This can’t be the end,” Selene said.
